Embracing the Summer Challenge of Career and Parenthood

Dragging your kids to day camp every morning and struggling to balance work and parenting? You're not alone. This week on Steel Roses podcast, I get real about the chaotic dance of motherhood during summer break. Juggling a career while being present for the kids is no small feat, and the stress of adjusting to a new routine is taking its toll. Tune in as I share my own mental health check-in, reflecting on the impact of reduced work hours and the challenges of maintaining focus amidst the chaos.

In this heartfelt episode, I emphasize the universality of these struggles—whether you're a stay-at-home mom or a working parent, the battle for balance is real. We often minimize our challenges by comparing them to others, but every journey is uniquely tough. Let's dismantle the myth that one type of mother has it easier than another. Grab a cup of coffee, take a deep breath, and join me in acknowledging that it's okay to vent, seek support, and remind ourselves that we’re all in this together.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:01

Hi everybody, welcome to another episode of Still Roses podcast. This podcast was created for women, by women. I'm coming to you live today from week two of summer break. You know, week one was like a novelty and I've been actually like trying to organize these episodes around thought starters, like things that I see that I think might be helpful or you know good, good things for us all to be thinking about. But this episode is not that. This episode is one that I just want to share because I again suspect we were all in this boat. So this is like my mental health mom check in with you guys and apparently my mental health is affecting my physical health. And I woke up week one as I started to say summer break was perfectly fine and again, like it's like the novelty of, it seemed like it was all good For some reason.

Speaker 1: 1:00

Week two, now that the kids are in day camp for four hours from eight to 12, they're in day camp Now, initially this felt like oh my gosh, eight to 12. Like that's four hours of time that you know they'll be out of the house. This will be good. Yes, it's good. I'm not complaining, but I am complaining because dragging them out of the house in the morning is painful and annoying, it's like torture and I literally this is the third day of day camp and I'm already like maybe they should just let it go, kind of thing I'm not going to because they're doing educational things with them. So I'm going to gut it out, regardless of how insane it makes me.

Speaker 1: 1:42

But Monday was tough for me personally because, again, like the kids are home, like it's disrupting my schedule. I no longer have seven hours of concentrated focus time during the day. That's been whittled down to maybe three. And now I'm doing that painful juggle in the afternoon of like yes, they're here and yes, I'm working, but I can't really get that focus time that I very critically need. So it's starting to bleed into my evening and me personally, I'm like I don't want to work in the evenings, like this sucks, like I got to hop back on my computer. But on the same note, I'm like I know I kind of have to. I don't really have a choice. Like if they're taking up my afternoon and my daytime hours, I'm going to have to suck it up and work at night to make up that time. So there is a balance and I know that. I'm fortunate that I can even make that call. I know very deeply what it is that when you know you don't have that flexibility, and I do know that this is an incredibly amazing privilege to have. So I don't want anyone to ever think that you know, I'm not grateful. I am incredibly grateful for being able to work at home and be able to make that call to say, like, all right, well, I'll work at night if I can't work during the day, but that doesn't mean it's not hard.

Speaker 1: 3:03

I have family members that only have one child or two children. I think I have the most. Now that I think about it, I think I'm the only one with three on my side of the family. I know people that don't have to work. They're stay-at-home moms.

Speaker 1: 3:17

I know the gamut of different kinds of women out there that are also dealing with having kids and there is no easy scenario, and I want to make sure that everybody kind of understands that, because I've had people say to me oh well, you have three, I'm not going to complain to you. No, you can complain to me. Ish is hard. I'm just trying to watch my mouth. Because I've had people say to me oh well, you have three, like I'm not going to complain to you. No, you can complain to me.

Speaker 1: 3:40

Like ish is hard. I'm just trying to watch my mouth because I know kids are probably around, but it's just hard. It's hard Like it doesn't matter if you have only one, it doesn't matter if you only have an infant. It's hard making that adjustment and and kind of changing everything about yourself because now you have a child and you're trying to make that juggle work. It's hard.

Speaker 1: 4:00

It's hard for everybody. I don't care who you are, even if you have nannies, like you still went through a physical trauma in your body by having kids. There is no like, oh well, she shouldn't be complaining, she should keep her mouth shut, absolutely freaking. Not. We can all complain here. Everyone can complain. You have a right to complain. You have a right to your feelings. I don't care how people try to gaslight you. I don't care about people trying to tell you like you know, not acknowledging your feelings and telling you like, oh well, you have it easy because you don't have to do this BS. I call BS on all of it because it's a struggle for everybody. So I just want to put that out there. Like having kids is tough. It doesn't matter if you have one kid, six kids, it's hard, all around it's hard. So there is not a moment where you're going to hear me be like, well, I have the toughest, absolutely not. I know that I have some things easier than other women. I know that I have something harder than other women. I know that, like some of my struggles are self inflicted because I volunteer and I'm podcasting and, you know, trying to run my own company on the side while also working full time, like I know some of that's me. But again, like it's hard, it is hard.

Speaker 1: 5:15

So me personally, second week of summer, kids are home. I love them so much, I want them around all the time, but at the same time I don't want them around at all and I want them to be quiet all the time. So there's this constant, constant inner conflict. I think some of you might be chuckling right now because, literally, that is it right. Like that is the constant mom struggle. I love you so much, I want you around all the time. I just want to hang out with you and have fun, but also, could you please just be quiet and just sit next to me quietly, nicely? You know, like it's like a constant battle, it's like the battle of wills in there with me. So I don't think I realized how stressed out I was about work, juggling work and the kids.

Speaker 1: 5:58

And I woke up yesterday morning, today's Wednesday. I woke up Tuesday morning unable to turn my head. My neck is all locked up down into my back, which is interesting and the doctor said you have to lay flat on your back on the floor for 15 minute intervals throughout the day with an ice pack on your neck and a rolled towel under your neck. And I said okay, doc, I'll do my best here. And so yesterday I tried that out, but then I also still had to work, so I had to stop after 15 minutes and work. And it's just comical to me because my husband he's trying to just remind me but he's like, oh, don't forget, make sure you put ice your neck and you take a minute to lay down today I don't know when you think that that's good's. Like my biggest struggle, like when am I supposed to be doing these things? Unfortunately for me, like I don't have a choice, I am going to have to take little breaks today to ease the tension in my neck, because it is actually quite painful.

Speaker 1: 7:04

My little guy last night. Well, my big little guy last night said to me he was like, mommy, you've been complaining, like you said your neck is hurting, but like you're not like crying or screaming or anything like that, like any, like basically saying you're not obvious in obvious pain. And it was an interesting moment for me because I basically said to him I was like I'm not in obvious pain because I have to take care of all of you. I was like, however, I can cry right now on the spot if you want me to, because I am in a lot of pain. And you know, he kind of noodled on it he's my thinker, he's my little attorney and he just said he was like, okay, mommy, he was like just just go lay down. And I mean he still continued to bother me for hugs and kisses and everything like that after I laid down, which got a little, a little bit much after a while. But yeah, it was one of those teachable moments for my kids to say, like just because you can't see it doesn't mean it's not there.

Speaker 1: 8:01

So it's Wednesday, I'm still in quite a bit of pain, but I'm still going to have to do what I need to do today because you know, that is mom life, right. So there's that I actually had again thought starters and things that I wanted to reflect on with all of you. But I just wanted to share this because I think that, like again, we're all going through this struggle here together and there's going to be lots of moments where, like it feels really overwhelming, like I, my anxiety was through the roof yesterday. I was wildly overwhelmed with just everything, feeling like it was all crashing down on me, which it usually is. I have a right to be overwhelmed, um, and it was just. I was just. I was trying really hard to keep it under control, but it was like you could almost see the cracks like coming to the surface all day yesterday, and I was, I was trying so hard, but it was just all day yesterday that it was just cracks surfacing where I was just getting overwhelmed and frustrated and stressed out.

Speaker 1: 9:06

And then the depression creeps in, which is always interesting, and then I have the whole back and forth in my head of Jenny, this isn't you, this is hormones, or this is anxiety, this isn't you. Make sure that you try to balance yourself out, that sort of thing. So it's just a constant, constant thing there, and I think we all are on this journey and I think that we all have this battle in ourselves where, no, you're not going to be happy all the time, like, how can you? Like you know there's going to be some sense of peace for most of the time, but you're not gonna be happy like 100% of the time. There's gonna be moments of frustration or anything, and you got to just make your peace with that. So, in any case, I am surviving, two weeks in, I am trying to give myself some grace, to just continue on this path and, you know, making the most out of the summer, even though I am getting stressed out, having the kids home. But yeah, you know, you just you work through it to the best of your ability and you just hope and pray and keep plugging along, because what else are you going to do? If any of you are also going through this, I mean you can.

Speaker 1: 10:23

There is a great feature now on the podcast where you are able to message me directly, so feel free to message away and let me know your thoughts, and I hope all of you are doing well and having some fun. Don't forget to prioritize fun during the summertime, because for a long time I didn't, and it's time. I appreciate all of you listening. If you have a couple minutes, if you could leave me a review, I greatly appreciate it every for every review that the podcast gets. It actually helps to introduce the podcast to other folks. So the more reviews I have, the more it gets to be on other people's feeds it'll it'll kind of push them along to say like, hey, there's a, there's some great content here. So I appreciate all you doing that. Feel free to message me directly and you know we'll just keep hanging in there together. Thank you so much, all of you, and I hope you all have a great rest of your week. Take care, we'll see you on the next one.