.jpg)
Steel Roses Podcast
Steel Roses is a podcast created for women by women. Social pressures for women are constant. Professionals, stay at home moms, working moms, we are here to tell you that you are not alone! This podcasts primary focus is providing real honest content shedding light on the daily struggles of women while also elevating women's voices.
All women are experiencing similar pressures and hurdles, and yet, no one is talking out in the open. If these topics continue to only exist as whispered conversations then we further permeate a culture of judgement and shame.
Join Jenny weekly as she discusses topics that effect women in a relatable, honest way.
Steel Roses Podcast
Simran Sahoo and Empowering Stories of Women's Resilience in the Workplace
What does it take for women to truly thrive in the workplace? Author Simran Sahoo joins us for a compelling conversation about her book "Good but Not Good Enough. Her Dream, His World," sharing vivid stories from her journey uncovering the harsh realities of workplace gender inequality. From her high school research beginnings to becoming a published author, Simran provides powerful insights into the barriers women face and the inspiring ways they overcome them.
Our discussion uncovers the pervasive gender biases that make women feel they must be overqualified before even applying for jobs, the misconceptions around maternity leave, and the intense balancing act of motherhood and career. Hear personal anecdotes about women's struggles and triumphs, and learn actionable strategies for self-advocacy and systemic change. We also reflect on the historical strides made in gender equality and the ongoing challenges that demand our attention.
Simran and I celebrate the progress and growing activism among young women today, fueled by social media's power to amplify their voices. We delve into the importance of storytelling and community, sharing our podcast's milestones and personal growth experiences. Together, we emphasize the significance of raising mindful sons who understand consent and equality, aiming to shape a more inclusive and equitable future for all. Join us for an episode filled with insightful discussions and empowering narratives that highlight the collective efforts to transform the workplace and society.
A must read! Check out Good But Not Good Enough
Interested in podcasting? Check out Podcasting Unboxed: Your Comprehensive Start Up Guide
Love this content? Check out our links below for more!
Linktr.ee Content
Instagram
Jenny's LinkedIn
Hello everybody, welcome to another episode of Steel Roses podcast. This podcast was created for women, by women, to elevate women's voices. I am very excited about today's guest. I was very, very excited when I got a message from today's guest to come on to the podcast. Today we have Simran Sahu with us. She is the author of Good but Not Good Enough. Her Dream, his World. Simran, welcome to the show. Thank you for having me. Of course, I'm thrilled every time I get an inquiry for a guest, and yours really piqued my interest because of the type of book that you wrote. So why don't you tell the listeners a little bit about yourself and how you came to author this book?
Simran Sahoo:Yeah, of course. So my book Good, but Not Good Enough. Its central message focuses on how little girls are often told that they can do anything they want, only for them to grow up and realize that they live in a world where that might not be true and those dreams that they had when they were little might be prevented by the workplace gender inequality that they might encounter later in their life. And I came across this topic when I was a freshman in high school and I was researching for an original oratory speech that I was planning on writing and giving, speech that I was planning on writing and giving. And so, as I compiled all of these negative testimonials about all these workplace encounters that these women had that led them to having, you know, very grave like mental health issues, or they felt very sad or unmotivated to continue going to the workplace, I covered all these, these statistics and these stories and also some of the personal encounters that I had with people, and I put this in this speech and I started giving it to my stage and debate coach, and I was halfway through when she stopped me and she said how do you expect to contribute to a solution when you're only continuing to be part of the problem and perpetuating this message of gender inequality in your speech and to other people. And that really resonated with me because I you know, I was just a freshman and I was already spouting all these statistics about how unlikely it is for us to succeed, and I genuinely believed it and I wanted that to be the message that I was giving to other people. And so I took a step back and I looked at all this research that I had and I thought what if I put a more positive spin to this research? And so I started cold emailing, just connecting with people, and I was able to garner a very pretty positive response from people.
Simran Sahoo:A lot of people were very willing to share their stories and actually it wasn't like I even like went out of my way to find people who had negative experiences with workplace gender inequality. It was just that I started talking to women and they all had this like some defining moment of their career that made them feel like, oh, wow, like this, is this really what, like my life is going to be like? And so, like some of the stories that I have, is that like I interviewed this insurance specialist who had to write Christmas cards 24-7 because her manager believed women could only be secretaries. I talked to this bestselling author now, and she's also a gender equity expert but her boss wanted her to do the dishes because women were supposed to be doing the dishes the dishes, because women were supposed to be doing the dishes. I talked to this government executive who was fired from her previous job before she reported physical harassment. I talked to this mom who wasn't able to ever enter the workforce because she felt like she wasn't good enough and she didn't have the qualifications to do so, and also, child care isn't free and paid maternity leave is still not mandated all throughout the United States.
Simran Sahoo:And I had all these stories and I could have created again a very negative book and a negative research portfolio. But I would ask them a couple more questions and I would ask them what was your dream as a little girl and every single person's dream that they had as a little girl? It wasn't fulfilled, but they said that their dream now is to continue to make the workforce, the workplace, better for little girls like me who are dreaming and who want to enter the workforce someday. And some of these women are now hosting their own workshops. They're building their own organizations to mentor both women and men about how to approach this boundary. About how to approach this boundary, there's people out there who are helping other little girls like me and teaching them how they can join the workforce with a positive mindset and how to overcome any barriers that they might have on the way, and also they're creating other women's networking organizations with other women who have faced similar things, who are very high up and are oftentimes the only women in the room, and showing them that they have such a positive force outside of the room waiting for them.
Simran Sahoo:And so I was able to compile all of these inspiring, painful but inspiring stories into this book and intertwine my own experiences as you know, a girl these past 18 years and um, sharing it with a lot of people and it's allowed me to connect with a lot of people. I've been able to talk to so many people and women and men and find a common ground using this book and, honestly, like this book has been so, so, like it's. It's been something that I've wanted to do for a really long time. Like I grew up reading books, I grew up reading anything that I could put my hands on, and I was so like, uh, I would say like I appreciated those fictional characters that I could spend my time with when I was a child and they were some of my best friends. And now to be able to interact with real life characters in my life and make a small difference in this real world, it's truly amazing for me.
Jenny Benitez:So I started reading your book and I loved it from the beginning.
Jenny Benitez:One thing I will say also, by the way I also, when I was younger, was like a voracious reader, and I would like over the summer kind of set like a goal and I'm talking like I was in grammar school, like I was a child and I would set a goal and be like well, last summer I read 30 books, so this summer I'm going to read 40 books and I, every summer, would go to the library because it's way back. It's way back when people actually had to go get physical books. And I would go and get books from the library and I would come home with like piles and piles and piles and piles and piles. And it was through all of that reading when I was a child that really expanded my mind and expanded my world, and it seems like that's how yours started out as well. But you said a couple of like important points here. First and foremost and I actually said this to my mom the one time and she was like that's really depressing and I'm like this is like the reality, though Every single woman I know has had some kind of gender workplace discrimination, some kind of harassment at work. There is not one woman that I know that has been totally unfazed and gotten through their career without having to navigate something that really was unpleasant. So that's real. That's a real thing. Personally, the biggest hurdles that I ever had was trying to get a promotion and for some reason and I'll say this, and I don't think women toot their own horns enough but like I'm always very I've always been very good at my job I work really hard. I'm a hard worker I try to like gain more skills. You know the whole bit and much like most women, I would wait until I felt like I was perfectly suited I'm using like air quotes, but like perfectly suited for the next level.
Jenny Benitez:So this is like categorically, it's a female only issue where we feel like and I think you said it in your book we feel like we have to be a hundred percent qualified for something before we'll actually take the leap. Um, and that's just not the case for men. They'll apply to jobs even if they only have like 60% of the skills or 50% of the skills. One of my other guests and I were talking about this and and she said like men will just apply to jobs and assume like, oh, it'll be fine, I can get the job and figure it out later, whereas women feel like they can't apply to a job unless they're a hundred percent qualified. And we do this to ourselves, and I've done this to myself over the years as well, only in the past couple of years had I recently been like you know what? Like I don't I have the skill set enough to fill in here, like I can make this happen. So that that's.
Jenny Benitez:That's a bit of a gap there in the workplace. That that's a real world thing that, like women have to overcome, like all of us have to get past. That, and something I want to share with you too, because as you're growing into your studies and as you're going into your profession eventually, and what you're going to eventually be doing, you do have to keep in your mind you don't have to be 100% qualified. You already have the knowledge base here, like, and you're you know the way you speak and everything. You already have a knowledge base here, like, and you're you know the way you speak and everything. You already have a strong base. So it's really a matter of like, just kind of knocking on the door and pushing the door down in some instances. So there's that you know not needing to be 100 qualified.
Jenny Benitez:The other part is, um and this has been my experience for myself and then observing as well women tend to feel like, um, we're at work, that our work will speak for itself, and this is actually part of the promotion issue that I had personally experienced was I always assumed like, well, I'm working really hard, I'm working long hours, I'm doing my job. Well, I'll get a promotion eventually. I'll wait for my annual review and I'll get there eventually. And almost every single time, at the three-year mark, there would be no promotion in sight and I would go and say, hey, listen, I'm doing all this great work, I'm looking for a promotion. And there was one distinct instance that I think I might've told you on our intro call, where I was put together, this whole presentation of like how well I had done and how excited I was and all this stuff, and I was like I'm ready for the, you know to level up. And I presented it to my manager and he said at the time he was like well, yeah, you are the highest revenue bringer and earner and this and that, but you know you didn't email this guy back within 24 hours. So you got to work on that.
Jenny Benitez:And I remember being like I don't understand and it's crazy, right, like to hear something like that. And I remember just being like I don't understand, like what, you know what is happening there exactly. And so there's that like there there's, you have to. You can't rest on your laurels. So you can't assume that someone is going to level you up, because that that almost doesn't happen. Like you have to be aggressive.
Jenny Benitez:So I had a young man that I had worked with many years ago and um, oh my God, now I feel old about nine years ago and um, oh my god, now I feel old about nine years ago, and and we were in the same agency and I was leaving for maternity leave for my twins and he was a level below, or two levels below me in like the hierarchy of things and he really wanted a promotion and so he was kind of like dancing around it, but he wasn't real great at his job.
Jenny Benitez:So they really it really wasn't going to come to pass. And right before I went out on maternity leave, he actually told me he was going to use my maternity leave to leverage it to push him into a higher position, cause he knew that as soon as I went out isn't that crazy? He said. And he told, he told it to me like it wouldn't be a big deal and I was like I feel like this is like, but he said he was like you're gonna be gone and they're gonna need someone to do the work and they're gonna need me. So I'm gonna push, I'm gonna force them to promote me and that's they. They did it like. So I'm sure you heard like loads. I would love to hear more from you on like who else you talk to, because that was just a couple examples from like what I've observed yeah, that that's crazy, but, yeah, like, actually.
Simran Sahoo:Um, I had an experience with someone that I talked to who talked about how, um, when she was like trying to leave and she was like trying to like ask for like paid maternity leave, they were like, oh, but like you already left before, so the second time around they were like we can't like you. Are we like you're the one woman that we've already given this much like leave to like how do you expect us to give you like another, like, uh, like paid leave later? And then another like experience that she had with another like boss where he said, oh, this is why I don't like hiring women.
Simran Sahoo:They just go off and have babies, and I think that was a line that really stuck with me because I was like that's not something, because that's obviously like. Oh, I feel like societal like standards have made it so that mothers are supposed to be caretakers, but then when men try to ask for paternity leave, like there's actually research on it, like they feel scared that if they ask for paternity leave, like they either won't be able to be in the running for like promotions or their boss might think, oh, they're not taking their job seriously, and so it's like really like frustrating. I think like, as a woman, to like always have to be the one to take care of the child and not have like the same like respect or duty given to the man too, even though they could if they wanted to, but they can't because of the way like the workplace is built.
Jenny Benitez:You know it's interesting and I've actually I've been reading little things here and there about how, like you know how men think of women and vice versa, like women think of men, and you know men objectifying women and thinking of them as objects and women not. We don't do the same way. Like our brains are just wired differently. But I find it very interesting that in your example that you just gave, the husband is afraid to ask for paternity leave because he doesn't want to essentially suffer the same thing that women suffer, because that's the reality of it is. Is that, like, even when, um, when I got pregnant with my son um, that was, I was only 10 years into my industry and I had already been working there in my field for a while but getting pregnant to me and at the time my career was like so important to me I was very scared that I was going to be perceived as like a slacker at that point or oh, she's just gonna go, like we're not gonna give her any of the good projects anymore. That was like a real, a real fear of mine. I doubled down and I actually, when I was pregnant with my son, I traveled almost every other weekend to conferences for work and I told him I was like travel me as much as you want, I'm here, I can do it. I. Even after my kids were born, simran, I used to work from like 7am to like you know, whatever it was at night, and I would get up at like six, get the kids out to daycare by seven and I would start working right away and then I would get my kids home, make dinner and then I would hop back on the computer at like nine o'clock at night and I would work until like one o'clock in the morning and that was every single day for like three years and I would work weekends and a lot of what I've observed and you might have I didn't make it all the way through your book yet, but, like you might have had some similar conversations the women who are working we're all hard workers, I mean hands down but the women who are working moms are like double down really hard and are trying to basically prove that we're not slackers and we actually can maintain both, which in itself is a problem, the fact that we even feel that, and I and I do.
Jenny Benitez:I feel that because even to this day, I just recently, this past week, after you and I had chatted, I was asked to travel for work and and I can't do that, like I can't, I don't, I don't have anyone to help me with my kids. But, on the same note, I also don't want to Like, yeah, I really don't want to travel anymore, even though I had upfront said I don't travel in my interview when I was hired. Well, now it's been two years and I guess that fact has been forgotten. And so I was telling my husband I was like I had to turn this down. And he was like, all right, so you turned it down, like who cares? And I'm like it, it still bothers me. And he, and he said he was like well, didn't they know? And I'm like, yeah, I told him in my interview that I don't travel, like I just I don't do that, it's not possible for me.
Jenny Benitez:But I still had to defend it again, you know. And then I've even had instances where I have told people, you know, I can't take calls between three, 30 and four, 30. I have to pick my kids up from the bus stop and which is not a big deal, it's like 20 minutes in and out or whatever. But the same people that I would tell this to would still consistently schedule meetings for four o'clock and I used to have to tell them, like you need to move this, I can't do it at this time, like not going to happen and having to. There's a lot of women who, when faced with that, they won't speak up again and say, oh, I really can't do this. They'll have to fold, because they're gonna feel like if I say I can't do this, I'm gonna lose my job and it's. It's such an unfortunate thing.
Simran Sahoo:Yeah, like um, I think there's also like that like, how do you be a mother and how do you also like work all the time? Because then there's like that like guilt that you might like feel like, oh like, but I also have to like raise my kids and make sure that they have like that like connection with me, but then I'm also scared that if I don't like, if I don't, if I spend like my time with my kids, then I might potentially lose my job, and I think that's's yeah, it's a very, it's a very difficult line to walk, because the support just isn't there, just and.
Jenny Benitez:I'm not even talking like oh, from your husband, like I mean, like from society, the support just isn't there. Our society was not created for women to work. Our society was created for men to work and for women to just be at home and I don't want to take away from stay-at-home moms because that's like got to be the hardest. To me, a stay-at-home mom is like the hardest job you could possibly have because it's 24 hours a day and like I can't have any of that.
Jenny Benitez:So kudos to all the stay-at-home moms, but yeah, like our society just wasn't built from it. One of the things that you highlighted in your book is something that, like, I've actually posted about and talked about, because it's still a little shocking to think about. I'm actually trying to find it because I want to quote you directly the fact that I think it was like not until the 1970s were we allowed to have bank accounts. Is that the right statistic or year? Do you happen to remember?
Simran Sahoo:I not off the top of my head, but that's definitely like the time range.
Jenny Benitez:Right, it was around, it was like 1960s. Oh, here we go, do you mind? Do you mind if I quote your book?
Simran Sahoo:No, no, go ahead.
Jenny Benitez:Okay, cool, let's see here. So, oh yeah, here's a good one. So, though a variety of work related opportunities were being open to women in the 1970s, a very subtle way of regulating their newfound freedom from the money they earned was in place. Unmarried women were not allowed to have their own lines of credit, and if they wanted to open one, they had to have a spouse co-sign. So this was due to the pervasive male view that women did not have the intelligence or capability to manage their own finances.
Jenny Benitez:And for my friends who work in finance that listen to the podcast because I know quite a few women that work in finance One of my good friends who's a podcaster as well works in finance and it's astounding to me that this is like a thing, and 1970s, I mean, I know, for me it's not that far off. My husband was born in 1975. Like, yeah, it's crazy, it was really literally just there. And that's the part that I always like to highlight here, because, the same way that you know that the things that, like we think about, like it didn't happen that long ago, um, there has been significant progress made, as your book states, which, by the way, I love. The progress like highlights, like that you kind of popped in there.
Jenny Benitez:I love that you phrase things that way and you do tell the story of original feminism. And the fight that we originally were up against was that there was literally no rights. We had no say. You couldn't own your own property, you couldn't have a bank account. When we purchased our house, simran, I remember saying that to my husband and I was talking to him about something, and my mom she was born in 1950, so some of her thinking is still from before and I said to my husband I'm like it's astounding to me that I would not have been able to buy a home or have a job or do this podcast.
Simran Sahoo:Yeah, yeah, I mean like I think like now that I've like been like a little bit distant from my book, like I focused a lot on like progress, like those first couple of chapters. But whenever I talk to people about like that idea of progress, they use it as like reasoning as to why gender inequality doesn't exist today. They'll be like oh, but like we've come so far, like you know, like just you know, in the 1900s, like you couldn't like do all of these things, but now you can, and so we've come a long way. So like technically it doesn't exist anymore. But I think that's like what is frustrating, because we have so much more to go Like there's so many things that we have to change, and maybe it's not necessarily like still like systems that are in practice that prevent women from doing certain things, but more so the mindsets that have been cultivated in society and have continued to be cultivated.
Simran Sahoo:Like every generation, there seems to be more problems, even though we're fixing so many of them. There's like every like with every generation comes new perspectives, new mindsets that are still very geared towards this idea that like, oh, like women can't do things, or women are less superior than men, they're inferior to men, and I think that's also like a reason why I wrote this book, because I think Generation Z should finally be the generation where this all ends and where we finally can create that bridge between all these like heroes that we have that have paved the path for us, but then also, you know, the people who come after us, who also have dreams. And, yeah, I think, like that idea of progress, some people manipulate it to something different.
Jenny Benitez:A hundred percent. You can see we have made progress. We have, and the original feminists that were out there were really just fighting to be able to be seen as a human, basically, and and have the same respect. I mean some of the stories that you have where these women were finding out that they were being paid, like you know, 80% less than their counterparts is. I mean, I know that I still probably make less than a male counterpart at the same level and probably with less experience, they probably are making more than me, but I do still see, like how far we as women have come. But there is still much more to do.
Jenny Benitez:And I do think of that, exactly what you just said, because I have twin girls and to me, I want these doors to be open to them. I want them and I will not just open, because it's one thing to open a door, but it's another to well, it's another to have a seat at the table, but then it's another to say, well, you know what, maybe I don't want to sit at this table, perhaps I want to create my own table, which is actually some of the women that I speak to on the podcast. We talk about that because maybe it's not a matter of like. We want to be part of this patriarchal society, but perhaps we need to be part of affecting change in our society, so that we're not part of a patriarch society, but that it's something that is truly a combination of both, which I do agree with you. I think we are starting to see, with the help of social media and things being so much more open now, I think that the voices are louder now and I do see that they're stronger. I mean, I see it.
Jenny Benitez:You know, my girls get me as a mom, so they hear me talk, so they're very, they're very vocal and I see in them and like what you talked about in your book, I've been, I've been reflecting on it because I I've been reading it in preparation to chat with you today and I see the spark in my girls where, like even today, you know we were outside playing baseball and that we have a pitching machine and it's, you know, lobbing balls at them.
Jenny Benitez:And my, my daughter, one of my daughters, is more athletic and she says she was like I'm so great, I am so great at everything I do, I am amazing, and I was like, oh, I just want to bottle that little energy for her and then like just keep giving it to her as she gets bigger, because you know a little bit much like what you had said, like you started to when you first started doing research when you were a freshman, for your, your or for your oral speeches, when you were a freshman, for your oral speeches. It's almost like deflating to hear all these stories and be like my God, what am I supposed to do? But then you're right on the flip side of it. Well, you're supposed to do what these other women did Get your education, fight for your education, fight for that job that you want. And if that job doesn't exist, simran, you have the great, great blessing that you are coming up in a, in a world now where you can actually create what, what path you want which is to me like amazing.
Jenny Benitez:So I am going to ask you something because I'm, I'm um, since you'll probably have a younger, fresher perspective amongst your, you know, from your perspective. Do you see that? Do you see that same hope amongst your peers, where you know, young women are coming together and saying, like we can make a difference here?
Simran Sahoo:I think, definitely, in a way, a lot of people are like more energized and more, I think, confident in what they're able to do. I know, like a lot of my friends have led a lot of campaigns for women. Do I know, like a lot of my friends have led a lot of campaigns for women? Like I remember, like a couple of years back when Roe v Wade was overturned, a lot of them protested, you know, went to the rallies, advocated on social media and I think, honestly, like having social media as a tool is so useful for us because now we can speak our minds on a platform and reach so many people. And you know, through different creative mediums, like, I think, a couple of my friends, they created a non-profit for uh, like, um, uh, period poverty and like period inequity, um, for like menstruation, like try to like make that a topic that more like girls talk about in school, just because it's a very like taboo topic about like, oh, like getting your period and stuff like that. And then it's like like so many people will do stuff about bringing more girls like civic engagement and like encouraging them to vote, just because sometimes, like there is that like gap between how many girls vote and like how like boys vote. And then I think also like just having people as inspiration. Like I know like a lot of my friends are like my inspiration, sometimes like whether they're older or even like younger, just like the projects that they've been able to take on and execute are very like inspirational to me and I hope that, like with my book too, I've been able to inspire other young girls in my area and the people that I've talked to. But I think definitely like because we've been able to create so much, just as high schoolers like I was able to write my own book and talk to so many people, and I'll like speak on this podcast and you know like so I've seen people like on the news, like young people on the news and then even like as I like go to college now and I'm connecting with like my future classmates and like learning about what they've done and the projects that they've done. Like it's it's so fascinating to see what we're able to accomplish with just such limited tools because we're like we are so young and so it it does like inspire me to say like perhaps we can continue to create, especially as we like get more tools, have more connections in the future.
Simran Sahoo:But I think also, like with social media, like there's that like other edge to it where it's like you'll see, like that negativity that people have about you know, all these girls and like women doing all these things because some people still have mindsets that are very set towards what it was in the past and so, and there's, they're able to build a big enough platform with other people who share those same you know outdated ideals and so whatever they put forth into um social media, like will like reverberate to like other people.
Simran Sahoo:And I think also, like I think you mentioned this like in our like call earlier, but again, like social media does allow for a platform for women to tear down other women and for other people to, you know, talk badly about other people instead of like uniting. We'll see on, like social media, like cyber bullying at like young age, where people are pointing out you know, common insecurities that women might have, and I think, with all these tools that we might have access to, we can create something amazing, but then also, at the same time, we see people creating something that's not as amazing and that's able to reach a lot of people in just about the same amount of time as something good does. Actually, I think like, sometimes like yeah yeah, faster than the good ones.
Jenny Benitez:It's. I was having this discussion with a couple other women that are in the same space as me, where we're trying to create something from scratch, and on this podcast when it was started.
Jenny Benitez:I I'm not on social media. I don't participate. I only participate in LinkedIn and because it's a good platform, it's educational, a lot of you know professional professionalism. I love it Because of that. I love it for that, and my husband was always telling me about like yeah, like it's, it's like you know, a lot of garbage out there, and he'll show me different things. And a couple of the people that I'm interviewing for the fall series the series that you're going to be included in um have told me like they are putting messaging out there but they don't want to use like Tik TOK because to them it's like the trashy. It's like the trashy way to go and and and it's not, it's a, it's a good platform but at the same time, it's like because of what's out there. And the discussion that I had most recently was like you know, you have someone who says something stupid online and they go viral and then they have like a million followers and like 24 hours.
Jenny Benitez:Meanwhile, I interviewed somebody for the fall series that started her own nonprofit organization to help women who don't have the medical coverage or don't have the finances for really important uterine health related issues, and she's starting out from scratch, just like how I did, and it's very small and it's very tough and it's a lot of work, and a lot of the women that I interview are starting from scratch and they're doing everything on their own, and the common thread that we talk about is we're trying to do this good thing here. It's here because I want to elevate your voice. I want people to hear your story, because I want them to read your book. This book is important. I want people to come onto this podcast and share their stories as women and their struggles that they're going through, because, to me, the more we talk about these things, the more we'd be able to affect change, because we're all aware that we're all going through it, and I think that's part of people being siloed, is part of an issue here, and it's just being able to use our voices. For that. It takes so much longer, because then I see these people, that kind of pop up out of nowhere, say something dumb, and then they're like off and running.
Jenny Benitez:I'm like my gosh, I've been podcasting. This is my one year anniversary was in April. My gosh, I've been podcasting. This is my one year anniversary was in April and I I'm waiting for. I'm just waiting for a little couple more like countries to get on board. But we start from starting from zero Now. This podcast has listeners in 22 countries and 229 cities and I'm like that's a big deal to me, because I had zero people who knew about it In the beginning. I just texted my family and said hey, I have a podcast, now make sure you listen. You know so it's, but it's taken a year for me to get that small little niche that I have. It'll take probably a little bit more because when you are trying to make a positive change, it will take a little bit longer because it's not going to catch that you know.
Jenny Benitez:Yeah, but it's like you know staring like it's like you know staring like people will stare at the sun. They're gonna stare at a car, you know they're gonna stare at a train wreck, but they're not gonna really follow along with something positive. So it is, it's a it's a tough road, but I think that, like majority of us plan to keep going. Like I plan to keep going Because this message is so important for everybody.
Simran Sahoo:Yeah, yeah, I think like also, like I sometimes wonder, just because I've talked to so many people that I don't know and they've had these like impactful stories but like I wonder, like how many other people am I just like passing by on the street, that I just don't know their stories?
Simran Sahoo:And I feel like, now that I've already written a book, like I want to continue like perhaps like doing something like more on the journalism side for like college and like as like one of my extracurriculars or something, just because, like I find it fascinating how, um, like I can just talk to someone, like learn their story and then kind of like immortalize it on a piece of paper that will then be read long after. Like we all like leave like this world, like it's going to exist for generations, like across the world after us too. And I think, like I feel like it's so like different now too, with like social media, because we can do stuff with that too, like it doesn't have to be just like paper and pencil, where we like write these stories, like we can, you know, put them in podcast form or like video form or like on YouTube and stuff, and so, yeah, it's definitely like, like I think it is definitely like fascinating how we can do all these things, like these tools now.
Jenny Benitez:Yeah, it's. I love what you just said there, the immortalizing somebody else's story, because, well, number one, you're right, every woman that you pass has a story like and that's the part that was. It's very humbling to me when anybody reaches out and asks if they can be a guest on the podcast, because to me that's like the Lord, the greatest compliment anyone can give me is to say I'd like to use your platform to spread my message. So that alone I'm always really appreciative of. But when these women, including yourself, come on the podcast and share, like, the reason behind and what they're thinking, what their thoughts are, it's huge. It's so in depth and everybody has these stories to them of how they got to where they are. And I mean some are still struggling, you know, some still are trying to just make it through day by day, and only in supporting each other are any of us really going to make it that far. You know, like I mean you might not think it and you might think like, oh, I'll go it alone, I can manage this, and you absolutely can. You might not think it and you might think like, oh, I'll go it alone, I can manage this, and you absolutely can, like I've had to do that, but to start a community of women and have everyone kind of connected. Like every time I get a guest, I consider the guests the community of Steel Roses. You all are part of Steel Roses. Now you've been a guest on the podcast, like you basically could reach out to me at any point and say you want to come back and I'll gladly have any of my former guests come back because I'm like we're here to support each other. You know we don't have to.
Jenny Benitez:Another unfortunate thing that we're taught through movies, through books, like literally it's everywhere is that women are catty and women need to drag each other down, and this is part of the problem to in the workplace, where down and this is part of the problem too in the workplace where you know you feel like you're competing with other women and the carrot is always dangled Like oh well, you have to. You know you got to do this, you got to step over this person to get to your next role and when I first started out professionally like I thought that and that's how I behaved and I almost lost the job because I was like behaving so badly. If you can believe it, I tell this story to people sometimes now, simran, and they think it's like really funny because it's not at all my vibe today. But when I was 22, I was like I'll crush you like a bug, like that's literally. I mean it's like the craziest thing, but that's because that's what I thought I was supposed to be doing.
Jenny Benitez:Only years later, I think it took like gosh, like six years or seven years for me to really catch on and be like oh you, you don't have to do that. And so now I make it a point not to operate that way and I'm like no, you don't have to crush someone else. Let's elevate each other. Let's use each other to like help rise up. So I think that there's a lot of that happening now too, so it is very exciting to be able to see it. I'm very happy that I'm in a position where I can use my voice to put this message out there.
Jenny Benitez:I've been doing research for some other organizations following like advocacy work and policy work, because we have to. We have to be the generations like us. I'm older and on the other end of it, but you coming in as strong as you are like this is it, like? These are the movements and honestly, I'm very excited to see what you do next. To be perfectly honest with you, simran, is there? Are there any final thoughts or words you'd like to share with the guests?
Simran Sahoo:Yeah, definitely. I think, like as much as my book is centered on like struggles that women face, like I did touch on, you know, like struggles that men also face because of these like societal standards that we set for our like workplace, because a lot of men feel like, from like an early age, they feel like they need to behave a certain way. They can't show emotions, they have to constantly be the breadwinner of the family or they have to. They like they can't be sensitive. They, you know, they have like they put immense stress on themselves to first to be perceived the way that society thinks that men should be perceived.
Simran Sahoo:And I think also, a lot of times, gender inequality doesn't just affect women. It affects everyone, right, it affects me, someone who is about to enter the workforce and is scared by what she sees. It affects men who, on the flip side, have to take on so much responsibility because women aren't given that responsibility. It affects bystanders who see the way that their female co-workers might be treated and even if they're not women, they could be a part of a minority group. They feel like, oh, they could be next because of that physical difference that they cannot control. And I think, once we realize that gender inequality is an issue that affects us all and that it's something that it can only be overcome once we all unite together and we realize that oh like this is something that we should all stick together and realize that it. Children and future generations aren't afraid of what their employer is going to think of them because of something that they can't control.
Jenny Benitez:You know, as you were talking, I was thinking to myself. I, while I also have my girls, I do have my son and I very, very much try to impart on him the, the messaging of like equality, even like no means no. You know, it's very interesting simran, even as like a little little toddler, very aggressively would take, you know, his sister's toys and and or. If they said no, they didn't, they didn't want him to touch something or do something or whatever. He still would do it and he did, he couldn't get it through his head. So there was. There's been many, many arguments in my house with me and him. My little, he's like little, he's eight, but he's like a little lawyer. That's why that goes into an argument. But I try very hard to and not try like I do this and my husband backs me up and we both do this to him. We're trying to.
Jenny Benitez:You know, it's not just about raising strong girls, but it's also raising your sons differently. Yeah, to recognize, like you know, a big one is no means no in my house, like, I'm very particular about that, I'm not gonna have my son going out there and being ridiculous. Yeah, making them understand, like you know. Yes, okay, you want to be alpha male here, but you need to understand that there's people out there that don't want to listen to you, and that's okay. Like you got to let it go. There's just a lot of lessons that we can teach our sons that will also affect change, because it isn't just about raising strong daughters. It's about raising mindful sons that understand that we're all. We're all qualified here, and you know, even earlier today this is a very silly, simple example when my kids are playing baseball in the backyard, my son did not want his sister to use the nice bat, the nice baseball bat.
Jenny Benitez:And he said no, you could use this baby one. And his rationale was well, you're not, you don't know how to do this, you're not good enough for this. And I was like, oh, hold on. And it was a fight and it got mad at me. But I'm like these are the little tiny moments when you have kids. It's these little tiny, granular moments that are going to really impart on them how they are when they get older.
Jenny Benitez:So I agree with you. I think that there's room here for growth. I see it. I'm very excited from things that I'm seeing right now, um, and I hope to be part of this, and I know you're going to be part of it, so I'm very excited about that too yeah, yeah, um, go ahead, okay.
Simran Sahoo:Like just like you said, like I feel like like kids don't just like come out like thinking like, oh, this is how I'm going to treat other people. Like I'm not just going to grow up to like do this. Like it's the way that they're raised and like the people that they surround themselves with and the environment that they grow up in that changes their perceptions or their mindsets and the way that they eventually will act. So it's all about like curating that environment so the problem doesn't continue to perpetuate throughout society.
Jenny Benitez:Yeah, absolutely. That was much more well said than what I said. That was much nicer Well. Simran, I greatly appreciate you coming on with me today and joining the podcast, joining the Steel Roses guest list Listeners. I'm going to link Simran's book in the description so you can all check it out on Amazon. It's not a huge lift. I read most of it yesterday when the kids were busy, so I do highly recommend it because it does really give a lot of background and history, and I think it's really stuff that we really need to remember and keep in mind as we're making progress. We need to just remember where we came from. So, simran, thank you again for joining the podcast today. Thank you for having me, of course, and everybody, we'll see you on the next one.
