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Steel Roses Podcast
Steel Roses is a podcast created for women by women. Social pressures for women are constant. Professionals, stay at home moms, working moms, we are here to tell you that you are not alone! This podcasts primary focus is providing real honest content shedding light on the daily struggles of women while also elevating women's voices.
All women are experiencing similar pressures and hurdles, and yet, no one is talking out in the open. If these topics continue to only exist as whispered conversations then we further permeate a culture of judgement and shame.
Join Jenny weekly as she discusses topics that effect women in a relatable, honest way.
Steel Roses Podcast
Resilience and Sisterhood: Julie Edelman's Inspiring Story
What happens when life throws unexpected curveballs, like a breast cancer diagnosis, divorce, and immense personal loss? Meet Julie Edelman, the Accidental Housewife, who turned her life's challenges into a powerful story of resilience and sisterhood. Through her latest book, "The Accidental Sisterhood," Julie shares her journey from shock and disbelief at her diagnosis to the critical importance of early detection and her treatment process. She discusses how these life-altering experiences became the backdrop for her first bestseller filled with practical life hacks and humor.
As we explore the theme of aging gracefully, Julie shares her insights on the misconceptions about life after 40 and the rich wisdom that comes with maturity. We touch on personal growth, the evolution of deep relationships, and how authentic storytelling brings characters like Jules Malone to life. This episode emphasizes how overcoming serious illnesses and embracing womanhood and sexuality amidst health crises can lead to profound personal transformation and a renewed focus on what truly matters in life.
Lastly, celebrate the essence of perseverance and community with us. We reflect on the journey of a successful lifestyle YouTuber and the milestones of our podcast, including our hundredth episode and upcoming third season. Julie's excitement about her new book launch and the positive feedback it has garnered underscores the resilience found in sisterhood. Tune in to this heartening conversation that champions the contributions of women in their 40s and 50s and the importance of finding moments of brightness in life's challenges.
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Hello everybody, Welcome to another episode of Stale Roses podcast. This podcast was created for women, by women, to elevate women's voices. I'm very excited to introduce you to our guest today, Julie Edelman. She is considered a trusted resource of lifestyle wisdom and widely known as the accidental housewife. Her appearance on the Today Show, the View and Rachel Ray have made her a household favorite, and now she's sharing her most personal story yet through her book, the Accidental Sisterhood. Following her breast cancer diagnosis, Julie turned to writing as a means to process her experiences and connect with other women facing similar challenges, including illness, toxic relationships and heartbreak. Julie, welcome to the show.
Speaker 2:Hey, you know, when I hear that, I get goosebumps because it's hard for me to believe I've been through a breast cancer journey. It's one of those things when it happens. First of all you're in a state of shock and you think, oh no, it can't be, I don't have it in my family, and you know why, why? No, it's I don't have it in my family, and you know why. Why no, it's probably just a little, you know hide. And then the reality starts to set in as you go through the journey. But it's also you said I'm widely known. I thought you said wildly known as the accidental housewife.
Speaker 2:So I like being wildly known, and yeah, so it's been.
Speaker 1:My journey has been largely rooted in accidental I think that I like that, though, and I want you to go into detail introducing yourself to the listeners. I would love to hear about your story leading up to the book, because it seems like the book was really like almost like a catharsis, like I'm putting myself into this book, so what along your journey? Obviously, the breast cancer diagnosis was a large part here. What was your inspiration there? And share with the listeners a little bit about yourself.
Speaker 2:Well, as I just mentioned, you know, being accidental or how things have happened in my life, seems to be my trajectory, my theme. Years ago, just to give some background, the accidental housewife came out of another life-changing detour. I was going through a divorce, my father had passed away and my dog had wandered off and had a stroke and fell in the pool, and, yeah, so I was at this really perfect storm, or imperfect storm of life, and I was trying at the same time, much like many women, balance being a mother, being a wife, being a career woman, and finding that there was no time for me. And how was I going to deal with all this? Because I didn't really have the skills of necessarily being a housewife, but someone had to do it, you know, to keep my son fed and my home from health inspectors. So I accidentally became this housewife and started writing these hacks and put them into a book which fortunately became a bestseller because it resonated with so many women who are trying to balance all those things.
Speaker 2:And that's where both my life experience and life detour accidentally came up with the book, but also began a community of like-minded women and my feeling that they weren't, you know, alone and that what they were doing and how they were doing it was okay. So that, in a sense, has sort of guided me and navigated my way as years pass and then fast forward to, you know, january 2023, when I find the lump in my breast and I was doing a selfie. So all you women out there must do them. It saved my life. I had just talked about wanting needing to go for a mammogram, having not done it for over four years because of.
Speaker 2:COVID and what have you. And another thing you must do Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Please go out there. But what happened was clearly I didn't know what stage it was at first, and so you don't know if you're facing mortality or you're facing a long journey to getting well of chemo or what have you. I was fortunate, having found it early and that's really what's important with this, that it was stage one. But my doctor, who I adore and every time I see him I say to him have I told you lately I love you Went in twice because he felt the margins weren't clear.
Speaker 2:I then had to go through 16 rounds of radiation therapy.
Speaker 2:I was fortunate I did not have to lose my hair and you know that may sound like a lot, but when I sat in those waiting rooms seeing other women going through, seeing other women going through 32 rounds of that, then chemo, it's just, it's so heart wrenching and I felt grateful at the same time. And so you start to take a look at your own life and you know I I has, as I said before, I've turned detours, or life-changing detours, into something that's positive, and with humor, and in high heels of course, because I love my high heels. And in this case, there was a dream I had, and that dream was to write a women's fiction book, and I knew the title and I knew the ending, but I didn't know what was going to go in between, and so I would stare blankly. But you know, being diagnosed with something that is devastating even though it wasn't, thank God, you know the end it provided me a new beginning and motivation to write this book and to take on this detour and to turn it into my dream.
Speaker 1:You know it's interesting. I want to touch on a couple of things that you talked about. So, number one, the accidental housewife, that and how you mentioned. Like you know, you basically like put these hacks into a book of like how you were really managing balancing things, and I think that and I want to, I want to say I'd love to link that to the listeners at some point too, because personally, that's a challenge for me. I'm trying.
Speaker 2:So hard, hey sister. That was my first sisterhood and I'm like I'm part of that, like I to.
Speaker 1:I have to look into it because I'm I'm already there. That's a personal challenge for myself. I talk about it a lot on this podcast, like trying to maintain some semblance of like sanity my kid. I have twin girls who are seven.
Speaker 1:I have a little boy who's eight oh yeah, yeah, it's a lot and I for some reason thought it was a great idea to sign them all up for these activities every day and it's just mayhem all the time. So the balancing I think that's wonderful. You did that, and the other part that I want to touch on here because that book's important but you're you're telling me something here that I want to highlight for the listeners is that you took these situations that could have taken you out. Basically, for a lot of people it does like sometimes it just knocks them out on their ass and you know they're. It's hard, it's hard for people to get back up from that. And you took it and you turned it into something that's like you know what? I'm going to help other people with their journey by giving them my life example here.
Speaker 1:So I want to commend you for that, because that's really, honestly, a huge baseline for this podcast. It was founded on the concept of you're not alone and I'm saying you to women out there. You are not alone with what you're going through. A lot of us are going through what you're going through and we can lean on each other and support each other, and what you're doing is providing a tremendous amount of support for women out there, so that's a huge, huge deal. So I really want to commend you for that, because we need women like you who are coming to the table and saying not everyone else, maybe I had to go through it, but you know what you don't have to, because I went through it. I'm going to share my knowledge with you, and that's a big deal. Maybe I had to go through it, but you know what you don't have to.
Speaker 2:Because I went through it. I'm going to share my knowledge with you, and that's a big deal. Well, you know I don't feel like I should be commended, but thank you Because, as I said, there are women who are suffering and going through this so much worse than I. But I hope that, yeah, I can provide a little ounce of hope to them and to recognize too. You know, we all have to go through the journey our way. No one can tell you how to go through it and allow yourself there's almost stages, if you will, that you go through. You know the first the fear that oh my God, am I going to be okay. Your sense of self, which we'll get into. And then it's the acceptance of sorts Okay, you got to do this and you're going to take the path. You've got to do these treatments, these procedures or protocols, and then you've got to move on. Not everybody can and not everybody has that support system, and you don't need anybody's permission on how you go through it. I'm just that nature. My nature is not to.
Speaker 2:There was a quote from Cher who said she tends to look at her life and move forward, not from. You know, look back and that's who I am. I just look forward. What can I do to make my life right now to become so much more important than tomorrow? It's about this moment, because in a heartbeat your life can change. So thank you for commending me. But to your point, my hope.
Speaker 2:I wrote the book for me, no question, you know I'd be lying to you because it was a passion. I had so much fun doing this book and writing it. I can't wait to do my next. But now? But the whole concept of sisterhood became so much clearer to me as I wrote it. I really didn't have the handle on it as well as I do now. And then when, in tandem with going through my breast cancer journey, there was a whole nother sisterhood that started to evolve for me and that's something to Jenny.
Speaker 2:At different points in your life you have different sisterhoods that come together accidentally. It could be in college, for you know sororities if you're part of that. When you're a mother, you know group plays. And then when you get married well, I just said, becoming a mother and then when illness strikes or something of this sort all of a sudden your world becomes both bigger and smaller. And the people who really, really, really, really, really start to be.
Speaker 2:There are those in your personal life who become so strong and are my sisters, who, excuse me my sister-in-law was like nurse cratchit she came with me for my first surgery. Then there's other people my roommate from college who have been in my life like forever, but then there's the professional sisterhood too, and the medical sisterhood and my beta sister. So you find that these wonderful relationships and bonds on different levels, which particularly become more obvious and important as you get older, because you recognize what matters and that you can go out and have drinks with them, but it's when you really need them that they can understand and relate, because they've gone through more life experiences and you share so much more.
Speaker 1:There's. There's definitely something to be said for um, I was. I was actually just talking to a colleague about about getting, you know, getting older and she she's only 34 and a child, a child, only 34. And so I was talking to her this morning about, you know, just different, like health related, dietish, diet things and just healthy living, healthy lifestyle that I've been employing because I noticed like changes in my like physical self and my mental health as I got into my 40s. And I was talking to her about I said to her I was like you know, I just spoke to someone else yesterday, um, who just is in the peak, basically prime, and she's in like her late 50s. And I said I was like you know, there's this like, for some reason, everyone views like oh, 40s, and like over the hill or this, and that you know, but you're, you're really like if you change, I'd like to be over that hill again.
Speaker 1:You know what I'm like that to me that's like you're getting over that hill. That means like you've gained all this wisdom now of your whole life and it's makes you more focused and more appreciative of everything else around you than perhaps in your earlier days. Then you know, because you took things for granted, you're like I have all the time in the world. And now I had said to her, I was like I feel like I'm about to come into like a second life here, with everyone that I'm able to connect with.
Speaker 2:Like yourself, Well, I think there's another word I would use as you. I like to say mature, become more seasoned, you become more authentic.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:A hundred percent and I think that's really a key element. It's not about all the BS in your life and things you know. Sure, I still like my high heels and fashion, but at the end of the day, what matters are my relationships and being transparent about my life and really really wanting to help others.
Speaker 2:And though you can't you know, not everybody's going to react to me and embrace what my message is about having guts resiliency, but I hope the message that I do get through is that to take a moment, take a breath and say don't say why not Say what? If I do this, and I think that's really important.
Speaker 1:Yes, I wholeheartedly agree. So. So, on the writing journey, you're going through your own health situation and then you have the brilliant idea to pen this book and you said you already knew the end, but you had to get through. So what was the journey like? To be able to do it all together?
Speaker 2:Well, on this little typewriter. No kidding, I'm kidding, I'm kidding. Okay listeners.
Speaker 1:She, just because this is audio, this tiny handheld typewriter, and I kind of lost it a little bit because I'm like if she used that, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's sort of like murder.
Speaker 2:She wrote many many murder.
Speaker 2:She wrote now, um well, the journey, um, like I said I, I didn't know, I I just started writing stuff and, as I did know the end, I knew what I wanted it to be. I knew that the concept of sisterhood, women coming together to solve this mystery, if you will and I knew too that the core of it would be Jules Malone, who's clearly part me, part faction I call it faction because there's a lot of fact in there, with people who know me will absolutely know what's real and what's not. But you really can't be a great writer or a good writer even unless you cull from your life, because those experiences make it easier to write. You know, when I didn't have some of the experiences in here, that was more challenging because I had to figure out okay, well, what would I do versus what have I done?
Speaker 2:So I knew that Jules Malone, who's the key character in the Axel Sisterhood, would be very much me and I did it in a style that was very conversational. That's my writing style. It's not. You know. That was very conversational. That's my writing style. It's not. You know. Dickensque, with all these details and descriptions of it, was a dark, dreary night on a warm sunny day.
Speaker 2:You know, whatever, but that right away I knew. So I knew Jules and that started me off. Would Jules approach this fellow she's been with, who was somebody I had been with for years, on and off, and deal with him and having the reflection of understanding now what I know in real life, how I translate that into fiction life, not seeing the signs of certain things that in retrospect real life I saw. So that started to plant the seeds of just developing Jules as a character you have to know, and any writer out there needs to really figure out their key protagonist, because, particularly if they're the narrator, and in the book I end the prologue with I'm Jules Malone and this is my story. So it's very much a diary, if you will, of accounts, but going back, so that as advice to anyone writing is really key. And then it sort of just began to evolve. You know I thought this might be a novella, eventually like 60, 80 pages. Now it's 254. And but it, but it just happened. It's sort of, you know, like Jack and the Beanstalk. It just kept growing and growing and I had more and more fun with it. It actually came to a point that I finally had to say Jules, stop, let go, because it becomes almost like a child too when they're about to leave for college. Yeah, let it go, let it move on on its own. So that was my process in developing the concept and the characters, a lot based on my own experiences, coupled with then how do I make that interesting to other people, to make them resonate and have the authenticity that readers would want?
Speaker 2:And also this era of mystery. What's going to happen next? Oh my God, and did he really do that? How could she do that, you know? And these women. So it starts to happen next. Oh my God, and did he really do that? How could she do that, you know? And these women. So it starts to raise a lot of questions. And one last thing may I add is I also wrote it where each chapter is sort of like a potato chip. They're short, so that you want to read the next one and to leave you sort of almost on the edge and okay, I need another one. I need another one.
Speaker 2:I like that, because that's how I am when I read Okay, well, this is, this is perfect for you, then.
Speaker 1:I'm actually really excited because I don't I read. I do quite a bit of reading, I have to tell. I will be perfectly honest with you. I buy everyone's books that come on the podcast because I get super excited about it, so I will be. I don't know if you have a pre-order list or if I have to wait for launch day. We're recording this before Julie's launch of her book. That's why I'm asking that question.
Speaker 2:Well, you can, but it will be great Launch day? I think not. I think is October 8th, tuesday. So if you all go out there and get it that day, that'd be so so cool, I'd be so excited.
Speaker 1:I will set a reminder on all of my devices.
Speaker 2:Appreciate it.
Speaker 1:I get very excited about this, Well one. I love supporting every author that comes on this show, because you're all delivering a very personal message and a very unique message, and I think you said it in what you're talking about here that it might not be for every person. That's pretty much on point. You're not supposed to be for every person. If you're authentically being yourself, you're not going to you actually shouldn't be and if you are for every person, that means you're not really authentically being yourself.
Speaker 2:So that means you're trying to hit every point.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's not what you're going for here. So we cause, we want to hear from you and we want to hear from your story and your, your heart, basically going into this. Did you see? I've I've had a couple other guests that told me, like you know, when they were penning their books, um, when they were going through health situations, they also felt like it was like almost a cathartic thing, like to release everything into your pages. Did you feel like that, something similar to that?
Speaker 2:Well, I don't, you know, it was cathartic. It was more that it gave you a distraction, it was an escape. You know, writing the book wasn't so cathartic for me because it's it's fiction. I mean, it was in terms of coming to terms with me looking at myself as a woman, me looking at myself as a woman, because in the book I I find the breast cancer it's not a key theme, but in it I, and once I go through it, and this fellow sean, the gentleman who's my, my love interest and the man I'm in love or lust with, um, you know, says you're still beautiful to me.
Speaker 2:All this and I wait. In the book, jules waits months because even though she's been given the okay to make love, her sense of self and my sense of self was, I don't know, will he find me attractive? Will he also, will I feel the sensualness, the sensitivity, because when you look in the mirror after you've gone through the surgery and a funny story and there and this is a funny story, when I went and got the diagnosis, dr Zernicki, who I adore and I tell every day I think I may have said this earlier- have I told you today.
Speaker 2:I love. You said okay, we're going to get rid of the lump in your left breast and we're going to raise the other, the right, so they're even. And I was just like, get this thing out of me. I could care less. But then I left and my sense of humor was hey, you know what I'm getting? A GWP, a gift with protocol. My, my, you know, my menopausal breasts were getting a lift and now I don't have to wear a t-shirt. So I found humor in that moment.
Speaker 2:But in the book I do. I reflect upon that because that was my womanhood my sexuality was called into question, of how I would feel and how Sean or the man in my life would feel about my breasts and how I felt. So that is something that was cathartic and was something very important for me to talk about in the book. And there are other cathartic moments too, that when I reflect, I didn't always look at the going through it as a gift. But by the end of the book, jules looks at it as a gift her relationship with Sean, as do these other women who I'm not going to go into do as well, although it doesn't stop them from figuring out a way to avenge his detours and deceptions.
Speaker 1:Interesting. Yeah, I, I, it's. It's interesting that we're having this chat today because I also was having a discussion earlier today with another colleague about you know, when you're given a diagnosis such as what you had gotten, you know people react differently. And there's somebody that we were discussing that they unfortunately got a stage four diagnosis and different kind of cancer. But they got a stage four diagnosis. And I said I was like well, how is the individual doing? And she said I was like well, how how is the individual doing? And she said she was like they went back to work. And she said she's like I think that, like he's a person so passionate about what they do for a living that they saw that as like this is where I'm going to go and focus my time. And I said I was like you know, I could see that because on for some reason, on well I, on Friday of last week, I found like a mole that I have concerns about. So I have made my appointment to get checked.
Speaker 1:And I had said to my colleague today I was like you know, when I was going to sleep Friday night I thought to myself I'm like, if you're in a situation where you do get a diagnosis, do you have that immediate change in your perception of, oh my God, everything else that I thought was so important no longer seems significant. And on that thought stream I said to myself well, why are you pinning that to a diagnosis? You should really be thinking to yourself every day like I should be living my life Like these are the priority moments. And again on that same thought stream, I like made it a point to spend as much time with my kids as I could this weekend without getting mad at them.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean a person perspective. You lose it over time because you can fall back into, but I know I'm grateful for every day and the present and I try to embrace that. You know we're human, we, we, we, we bear because we're we've got emotions. But yeah, I mean, as I said, I live in fear, even though I feel fine, but you always worry. So that puts back, puts me back in perspective, to stay present, to live today. You can plan some for tomorrow, obviously, but I see my son as often as I can. I've always been like that, though. Even another story here is Luke's father had fourth stage Hodgkin's disease a year and a half after we got married. So I've also been on the other side. He's fine and it's 30 years later, so fourth stage doesn't mean it's terminal.
Speaker 1:Interesting Okay.
Speaker 2:He was, you know, one of the fortunate ones, but you're and he went back to work. We bought a new house, we lived our life and we didn't get caught or brought down by his diagnosis but again took it as an opportunity to turn an obstacle into an opportunity and move forward with your life, because what's going to happen is going to happen. That might sound trite, so while you're living, live the best you can.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I've gone through. I never had a diagnosis such as yours. I never had to go through anything that's serious. But I have, over the past few years, been down a path where I was trying very much to refocus and recenter myself because for a really long time I was a workaholic and I was, you know, losing days and days and weeks of time with my family and at the time I was justifying it in my head career, we need the money, this and that or whatever.
Speaker 1:But this is wisdom thing that I think you and I were chatting about right before, or maybe we said it on this call, on the recording that you know, getting into your my forties was almost like a, like an epiphany, and I felt like almost like awakened and alive with, alive with wisdom, and I'm like, oh my gosh, I have all this life yet to live and now I can live it as my authentic self. And prior to going down this journey, I never thought that way and I kept doing what I should be doing versus what I really want to be doing. So I love talking to authors because, again, like I was, I was an avid writer. I was constant when I was younger and I gave it up and for, like you know, a real job. Quote, unquote, and, and now I keep interviewing authors and I'm like I really want to get in there.
Speaker 2:So Well, and you should, you know, don't put off what tomorrow, what you can begin today. You know you have to finish, but at least start it, because that's part of it too. Today, you know you have to finish, but at least start it, because that's part of it too, having the as Somerset Vaughn said, the longest. The first step is the longest journey. Once you start, you're going to start to get hooked. Because that's what happened. I would start like, hmm, I better write this down. In the middle of the night I'd wake up and write little notes to myself. So if you begin it, it starts to take on a life of its own, which is really cool.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and that's how I started and I guess sneak preview for all the listeners listening, but that's sort of how I've started it. It's just been loosely based on what I already know and the driving force is going to be a lot like what you said, like you knew at the end that you wanted it to be focused on this sisterhood, this group of women that ultimately have come together to support each other. And that's always my goal is to showcase that, because women are put in too many instances. Women are put to where they're battling each other or, you know, trying to tear each other down, and we've been in that. I mean, that's such a tired old story. We don't have to do that anymore. Like this is not and we never had to do it really, but like everyone should just kind of cut, cut it out, like let's move on, let's move forward, let's elevate each other.
Speaker 2:And that's what, excuse me, one of the reviewers who read my book said you know, it's nice for a change, First of all to have not the wife start this off and tell the story, but one of the others, me, and that the women weren't angry or vindictive with one another. They saw it more as how did they individually all screw up? You know, I use the word fluck, which is a nice way of saying the other word. I like that. Well, I thought I had invented it, but I learned it's a gang of geese doing the other thing. But at any rate, but I just these women, you know they were all in shock, but they were more in shock at themselves than they were in shock with the things that transpired, the deceptions they learned about. That they didn't see it Because they're smart women. One's a cardiologist, a pediatric cardiologist, One's a divorce lawyer, and then one, the youngest one is 27. She's a naval intelligence officer, served on the ships and now owns the weed and wine shop called Blooms.
Speaker 1:So yeah, you know there's a variety too of agents and and come froms which I thought was important perspectives of how each woman related to both sean and then how we all related to one another I like that a lot because you are providing like a range of perspectives and like it's like that maturity level that we talked about a little bit too. Is that, like you do as you get older, gain this maturity of like, not feeling like you need to be? You know the in the drama mix, like no, you know, like I've gotten to a point where one of my neighbors actually said to me at one point she's like you're so annoying, you're like Switzerland, like you have. No, and I was like I have an opinion.
Speaker 1:But and she said she said it jokingly, because anytime any kind of catty like behavior was sort of around, I was just always. I would always say, well, you know, like that's just how they are, it's just their journey, it's okay, that's just who they, it's okay, that's just who they are, it's cool.
Speaker 1:And everyone was like I'm, like I don't take a side. Yeah, it doesn't even matter, because you know what if? If you know Janice down the street wants to be you know catty and talk about like you know how I showed up at the bus stop with flip-flops and like whatever, like I don't care.
Speaker 2:Well, you know, jenny, I mentioned that earlier. You realize too, as you get older and meet a lot of people, everybody has their come from and when they act a certain way it's not really acting at you, it's acting at their own life experience and their own insecurities. So the reactions then you don't take personally when you hear them, as much. If you think that way, if you like, throw it back. Okay, there's a reason this person's acting that way and it's not about you, it's about what's happened to them today in their life, and it's something at the job, who knows.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, I honestly like and it's very funny that you phrase it that way because, um, that is that's how I look at it and you know the times that I've gotten for I've heard, you know, from other people like, oh, so and so said this, or so and so said that, and I'm like, okay, well, they're not wrong, like that's true, you don't have anything to say. I'm like I really don't, I'm just not into it, sorry good for you.
Speaker 2:You know, go, keep on your path.
Speaker 1:I try to, I try to, I try to maintain, I try to maintain, I don't. I don't like to get into the nonsense. I do like, and I wanted to touch on a little bit like the courage it took to to put pen to paper with this for you, and then even with the character development I mean, since you did say like you're pulling from your own life experiences here. I mean, was it? I'm a little scared as I write my beginning pages, my little fledgling book over here. It does awkward to put it out there, or is it nerve wracking to put your information out there, Because I do think a lot of women could potentially be great authors and just they haven't tapped into it because they're scared.
Speaker 2:Well, you have to allow yourself to be vulnerable and for people you know people who read this. You know me, or you know some of me not be happy with some of my reflections or the way I've interpreted it, but it was. It was genuine. It wasn't hurtful or spiteful the way I wrote anything. It was honest and I also took responsibility or Jules does for her actions, um, and all of them do so. It's.
Speaker 2:It's really accountability comes into this as well with my characters that they're not placing blame on. You know they're angry at Sean, as you'll find out, and they're like how, how could he do this? But then, at the end of the day, too, they asked themselves how did I let this happen? And they let it happen because of experiences in their life that got them to that point, which is what I said to you about the come froms. So the cardiologist has her reason for wanting and getting involved with Sean. I had a fairy tale that I was looking for that he fulfilled, and then Jude, which I will go into all of these because I can't get the book away, but each of the characters had a reason that made it work until it did Was that enough to give you without giving too much.
Speaker 1:I like it too and this is like the potato chip thing you talked about earlier, by the way because now I'm like, now I'm like I really want to read the book, I'm really interested. Well, and actually what I was starting to say early is a lot of the books that I've been reading because of the type of guests I've been having. I've been very like coaching books and more in the self-help space, and I'm actually kind of excited because this sounds very fun to me and I'm like interested, like I want to get invested in these characters.
Speaker 2:Well, you know, jane, that raises a very and that's what I wanted. I wanted this to be a diversion, like it was for me. It was a diversion to do something in a dream. I wanted to be a diversion for women. Prop, that's my primary audience. When they read it, that they're just escaping, it's a fun, it's a beach read. I'm on the plane going away for the holidays. Here's something that's not so mindless. It's just like why am I reading this? It gives you something. It's got some substance, but that's really, you know, I mean, that's really just an epiphany I had that. I look at it and hope it can be an entertaining distraction that's relevant and fun can be a entertaining distraction that's relevant and fun.
Speaker 1:I'm excited about it, yeah, because I always have. I have this and I'm trying to get better at it. But I seem to have this issue where I feel like I always need to be doing something. So, even like in my leisure, I'm like, well, if I'm going to read something, it should be something that's going to be educational to me, and I'm like, ah, you don't always have to be so hard on yourself, jenny, like have some fun. So this is a second book for you and it's interesting because you said you act like a lot of things like accidentally have fallen into stuff, but now it feels like like this is in alignment with what you're meant to be doing.
Speaker 2:You know I never would have asked to or wished to God forbid have breast cancer Right, but it's changed my life and I get goosebumps right now when I'm saying it, because I would never I might never have written the book. More importantly, I've now become an advocate too, and the passion for building sisterhoods and getting the message out about getting mammograms, doing selfies and the importance of and power of sisterhood are things that I would never have been really doing. I don't know where my path might have led. I was really trying to figure that out. As I said, this wouldn't have been what. I would have gone and said, hey, can I get this? But it happened.
Speaker 2:And so many new opportunities are coming my way to help inspire and empower other women that I don't want to say I'm glad I got it, but and I'm look and again, I feel fortunate. So you know, a woman with four stage going through chemo right now is not going to hear feel my way and I get that. But this is also meant, as I said before, not just for a devastating health diagnosis, but any life-changing detour like mine was with my father passing my divorce. You lose your job, a relationship ends, so the magnitude of them is not what matters. It's really how you embrace them and you move forward to make your life better and make you happier, and just to say, hey, today's a good day or today's a better day.
Speaker 2:So, that's really a lot of my passion, my message, my yeah, I mean who to thank? You know that. And actually, one aside last, in Februaryary, moffitt asked me to be their speaker at their national board of directors meeting and I got up there and I said you know, a year ago I never would have thought that I'd be giving the speech and I'm humbled and I'm honored and I hope I can both help others through their journeys, at least just a little as well, well as raise awareness and also my book sales. A percentage of it will be going to Moffitt Cancer Center.
Speaker 2:So, hopefully that's why we need you to buy the books. Let's go get that cure for cancer. Yeah.
Speaker 1:I, you know I and I have to say like there is something to be said for being so in tuned with yourself and also with you know, so in tuned with yourself and also with you know, your world around you that when you have those moments that kind of push you or nudge you in a particular direction to take that step forward, because I think that that's where a lot of people get lost on their path. They're not listening for those little nudges. And I just spoke with someone yesterday who's, you know, she's launching a book and it's not until 2025. And you know she's talking about all these little, like what you said, like all these little opportunities are like kind of doorways are being open to her. And I said to her and I had shared with her too, I'm, like, you know, through the podcast.
Speaker 1:It was very interesting because I started this podcast with my cousin. Originally she was a co host and we used to do the episodes together and it was originally. It actually started originally to be focused on like, oh, you know, mom's everyday struggles, what are we going through? And sort of just sharing like that every day, like, yeah, things might be, you know, maybe you're pissed at the kids or pissed at your husband or whatever, but like we're all in that, don't feel like it's just you. It doesn't mean your marriage is a disaster. All of our marriages are kind of a disaster.
Speaker 2:Like it is what it is.
Speaker 1:It's life. It's life. Nothing's perfect. Yeah, like nothing's perfect. Ignore social media for all those perfect pictures that you're seeing with everybody out there, like that's not real. The podcast was actually launched on the premise of like real women coming to the table to say like this is real. This is how I really went through this and since the launch, my cousin has stopped working on the podcast. It's, you know, it's mind solely driven and it's opened up these avenues for me in engaging with all these other people, including yourself, and it's completely changed my life.
Speaker 2:Well, and I think that's important, what you said, sticking with it is another thing. You know, I never felt I didn't want to continue, but it was a journey. It was hard, I mean I mean I it's not a glamorous road, getting up at one two in the morning and writing and whatever but for me it was I, and I have videos you'll probably be seeing on social media because you know I want people to see the real, the authentic part of the road to, hopefully, best seller. That you know it's like movie stars say. You know they didn't become movie stars overnight. I mean, this is something you must stick to it and if you don't, that's okay. That you know, that's okay. But and there were so many people who would say, are you ever going to finish this? What are you doing? And you need to listen to your inner self, not to anybody else, because at the end of the day, you're the one who has to live with yourself and your dreams are going to reflect. I believe you know your what, what's really going on?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I completely agree and especially on the, you know, what a lot of people see is like the end result and they want to just get to the end result, but the reality of it is many of the movie stars we know today, a lot of the very successful people that are out there today, even successful content creators. There's a woman that I follow on YouTube that I think she's so fabulous and I just love her lifestyle and you know just the stuff that she talks about her decor. Like you know, she has a lifestyle YouTube channel and I started to look back and I was like, let me see, like how she started, because I you know, as any person who's doing a solo thing, it gets very daunting and you start to want to give up and it's like, well, why am I even bothering to do this? So I started to look back and her first videos were about five or six years ago. Now she's highly successful, but when she first started the videos were crappy. You got to put in the time.
Speaker 2:You got to put in the work.
Speaker 1:And it's like over time, and you know, and this is, you know, this season you're, you're being, you're in my fall series is my special series guest for fall Um, but this is my season two. I'm going into season three next year. Like I'm like this is this Congrats, this is? Yeah, this is. We had our hundredth episode recently. I had my hundredth episode launch recently. I'm like you know it's maintaining that momentum and that dedication to it because, yes, you're going to have hurdles, yes, it's going to feel a little crappy every once in a while, but if you could just get past that point to where you're about to be, because this episode is launching. It's going to be airing October 9th, so, as everyone's listening to this, that means that the book is available for sale now. So the book has launched and we have a link to it in the description of the podcast. Julie has worked so hard on this and I'm like going to be first in line to book. I'm so flipping excited about it.
Speaker 2:Well, this has been wonderful because you never know where you're going to wind up. You know, with the book I hoped it would be decent. I had my beta sisterhood read it, and then the real people who don't even know me. Now the reviews we're getting have been really, really, really, really wonderful. So I'm excited that I've created something that everybody can enjoy. They'll garner something from it. It's not just going to be fluff. I mean, as I said, it's not war and peace, but it's really, I think, pretty darn good. And, more importantly, it is an accomplishment that I did it and that I've gotten here. But hopefully, by doing this, it's a testament to others that they can do it too and that by buying it which I appreciate we can also help raise money, raise awareness and really cure cancer. But the thing here is and a line I use all the time is in us. We trust, and you've got to trust your inner gut, your resiliency. You can do it. And trust your sisterhood, reach out and depend on that.
Speaker 1:I'm not going to add to it, because I love it so much what you just said.
Speaker 2:Thank you, I have one question for you. Yeah, what's Steel Roses come from? The title Steel.
Speaker 1:Roses, actually the podcast is named for my grandmother, so my grandmother is 96 years old this year.
Speaker 2:Good for her.
Speaker 1:And she's still at Grandparents Day. All the grandkids and great-grandchildren. There was about 25 of us there. She's still smart as a whip Still very much with us. She keeps her mind sharp, reading books constantly.
Speaker 2:Get her one of these, If anything I was going to say hold on a second, I might get her a copy of your book. I'll get her one of these.
Speaker 1:I was going to say hold on a second. I might get her a copy of your book, but it was based on her because she's she was such a strong mother, wife, grandmother and really a source of inspiration for myself and for my cousins and everybody else.
Speaker 2:I was going to say I think that's another thing that we didn't touch on. But ageism is a big thing and you feel it starts to feel marginalized that you get older and you've been a professional career woman and this book isn't about young kids. I mean, yes, I have the 27-year-old, who's the millennial, but the other women are in their 40s and 50s and they're still relevant and they're still smart and they've got so much to offer and they're still smart and they've got so much to offer. So that's another very important thing. That part of my sisterhood and messaging was that age does not define you.
Speaker 1:I happen to agree because there's, unfortunately, this whole in our society movement of like, well, you get older, you're irrelevant, you're not worth it. For women specifically, there's a lot around like well, you can't have kids anymore, so you really don't matter, kind of thing, and you fall off the radar and that's like. That's where I'm sitting here. You know, coming into my 40s, being like this is literally my prime. I feel like I'm getting to the best parts of my life right now. Why would anyone think of this time of life as irrelevant? Or you're drying up or you're not there anymore.
Speaker 2:I'm like this is you got some drying up coming in the next decade?
Speaker 1:I mean I got some drying up coming, but I could take medicine for that, that's okay.
Speaker 2:It's not so bad. You know everything you just got to find, excuse me, like I said, I find the bright side. I try to um, not always, you know, I'm like I said, I'm human, but and that's if you can, if you can just even once a day find that little piece of brightness in it and try to use that to get you through when it's a little dark. Um, that's really important.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I, that's my motto every day, actually there you go and the uh, the one last thing, um, and there'll be a video that maybe you can put on your website too. I went to I love the song by Pink Turbulence. Yeah, and we did a video about that, because when I would do my radiation treatments, each time I would play her song and she talks about it. You know that, no matter how the panic gets, how bad it gets, it's just turbulence and it is. I mean, it's scary, but you got to ride it out and you got to figure out your way to navigate those turbulence. So play that song. It's a great song.
Speaker 1:I'm into it, I like it. I might link it?
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'll send you the. Should we send you the video? Oh yeah, definitely Okay, cause we did the video, I went, which is very special to me.
Speaker 1:And it talks about my cancer journey Absolutely Anything that you want the listeners to take a look at. We're going to link it in the description so that everyone can have access to it, including the book link that people can get right there to purchase. So all of that will be in the description. Make it easier for the listeners to access everything.
Speaker 2:And I guess Nanda knows how to all the outreach that you might do to promote it on social media and so forth. Yeah, she takes care of it. Don't not me. I'm learning, but you know it's. It's not my jam.
Speaker 1:Oh, no worries.
Speaker 2:Well, this has been great, Jenny. Thank you so much. I really enjoyed this.
Speaker 1:Thank you so much for being on today. I really appreciate you sharing your story, sharing how, how you got to where you are right now and really sharing your book, because this is the most important thing here. So thank you again so much for being on and listeners. We'll catch you on the next one, take care, okay.
Speaker 2:All right. Well, here's to steal roses. We'll see, and roses play a big part in the book. Now you got me hooked.
Speaker 1:Now I got you.
Speaker 2:Okay, grandma.
Speaker 1:Take care everybody.
Speaker 2:Thanks so much, bye.
