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Steel Roses Podcast
Steel Roses is a podcast created for women by women. Social pressures for women are constant. Professionals, stay at home moms, working moms, we are here to tell you that you are not alone! This podcasts primary focus is providing real honest content shedding light on the daily struggles of women while also elevating women's voices.
All women are experiencing similar pressures and hurdles, and yet, no one is talking out in the open. If these topics continue to only exist as whispered conversations then we further permeate a culture of judgement and shame.
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Steel Roses Podcast
Kimberly Grustas on Empowering Young Girls: Navigating Puberty and Embracing Natural Skincare
This episode explores the importance of empowering young girls to make informed skincare choices during their transition to womanhood. Kimberly Grustas shares her personal journey of creating Good For You Girls skincare and emphasizes education, nutritional health, and open communication with children about body changes.
• Importance of informed skincare choices for young girls
• Kim's personal story and motivation behind her brand
• The necessity of reading labels and understanding ingredients
• How puberty impacts young girls and addressing body image
• Role of nutrition in maintaining healthy skin
• The importance of positive communication between parents and children
• Encouraging a sense of empowerment and self-acceptance in daughters
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https://www.goodforyougirls.com/
https://www.instagram.com/goodforyougirls/
https://www.goodforyougirls.com/blogs/blog
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Good morning everybody. Welcome to another episode of Still Roses podcast. This podcast is for women, by women. I am very excited to introduce all of you today to our guest. Kim Grusas is the founder and owner of Good For you Girls Natural Skin Care, inspiring moms to protect what's most precious our girls. For over 30 years, kim has been instrumental in the growth of some of the country's largest nutrition and supplement companies. As a graphic designer, creative consultant and marketing advisor, kim has lived and breathed the natural products industry and her mission is to support girls in honoring their bodies and their rite of passage into womanhood. Kim, welcome to the show. I'm so excited to have you here. Thank you, jenny. I'm thrilled I would love for you so you already were working in the beauty industry, so I would really love to hear from you. I have a couple of questions, but I'd love for you to introduce yourself to the audience and tell them about yourself and how you ended up on this path.
Kimberly Grustas:So it's really crazy. I look back at my career and I said it kind of led me here. Right, I didn't it. It chose me rather than me chose it, kind of thing. So I was a creative director by by skill and trade and passion, um, but I was also a fitness nut. So when I ended up in my first jobs, I started in publishing and then I went to work for a really large sport nutrition. You know protein powders, amino acids, creatines, all of those things that affect the body and you're marketing it. You have to do the research. Okay, how is this affecting the body? So I was hooked. I was. I just really loved the research. I didn't give myself credit for being kind of a research geek, so I did that until the company sold.
Kimberly Grustas:And then there were several years and then I went to work for an advertising agency and I sort of had made a name for myself as being a female in a man's world and I was talking very differently about the ingredients at the time. It wasn't all about the muscle, it was about the ingredients, the quality of ingredients and how they function and, like I said, how they function in the body. So I went to work for an advertising agency and all of these brands started coming out of the woodwork to hire me and they offered me a partnership and I said no, thank you, and I started my own agency in 2000. And then so I was taking on sport, nutrition and at that time I was really introduced to the health and beauty, the natural products industry and I just loved their passion. Like it was again in 2000,. It was still really I call it the hairy armpit Birkenstock days. It was the natural people. They were freaky like, oh my gosh, you know, they, you know, and they were like making this stuff in their garage. But they, right, they were, they knew better than everybody. Right, it was crazy. But I just fell in love with it and I started to take on brands. So over my career I've developed dozens of brands from the ground up. And so, again in 2000, I started my own shop and then my daughter was born. Four months after I started my agency, my first daughter was born. Oh, wow, yeah, and we had been trying for a while. So we've sort of gave up, but so anyway. So that was a lovely surprise.
Kimberly Grustas:And she was born with severe asthma and allergies. So we were running to the emergency room EpiPens breathing treatments. She had an airway. It was an upper airway trigger, so it was anytime she would get a viral infection, which in young babies it's so quick, right. And her little body would just go lethargic and there was no warning, there was no wheezing, there was nothing. She would just like limp, like a baby, like a rag doll. She would just go limp. And so one of the emergency room doctors said do you realize how serious this is? And I said yes, I do so. So one of the emergency room doctors said you know, do you realize how serious this is? And I said yes, I do.
Kimberly Grustas:So that led me down the rabbit hole to understand why her triggers, what is triggering her? She also had food allergies. So we didn't recognize an infant. You don't recognize those until you start feeding them at nine months, but anyway, you know feeding them real food at nine months. So anyway, I was down the rabbit hole of research. Every candle, every scent, every laundry, all of it gone because they're. You know, when you have a sick kid you'll just do anything to make them feel better and you don't want to purposely put anything in front of them that's going to harm them. So we figured out her triggers.
Kimberly Grustas:I was the mom at every function with the EpiPen in my purse all the time, and then, two years later, my younger daughter was born. My second daughter was born. She had a touch of asthma, but she also had a hive disorder and then she also had eczema. So I'm like, geez, okay, now we're going down the rabbit hole of skin. By this point, I was just a research freak. I'm researching, researching, researching, and I controlled everything that went in and on their bodies and I became kind of the go-to mom when people would ask you know, hey, this, this, that, and it just was our way of life. It wasn't like odd for us, it was just that, hey, we didn't buy these products. We didn't. And I'm not, you know, I'm a. I'm a high heels, dressed up girly you know hair maker of.
Kimberly Grustas:you know I am not the earthy crunchy type, but that's how I lived Right. That's how I always appreciated the beauty sector. So fast forward to 2008,. My daughters loved Hannah Montana, we actually.
Kimberly Grustas:I think everybody remembers Hannah Montana, so we even brought them to the concert, which was super fun. So my daughter there was a bath set at the end cap of Target. She just beeline for it. She was eight years old and she beeline for it and she picked it up and I flipped it over and I went, wow, like oh my gosh, there was like four lines of dyes, but it was just, it was ridiculous. I wish I bought it, like I honestly wish I bought it today to have it, to see what kind of crap was in it. So I went oh my gosh, is this what companies are slathering on our children? Like?
Kimberly Grustas:I remember going to Claire's and Justice and seeing all those. You know you're in line and you're seeing all that crap on the side that they try to sell you. You know, I think if they just put it with you know unicorns and rainbows that girls are going to be, and unfortunately, again it with you know unicorns and rainbows that girls are going to be, and unfortunately again. And so there was another thing that happened a couple of weeks later and I just couldn't stop thinking about it and so one morning in the shower, the the name good for you girls popped into my head and I'm just a very intuitive person, like, again, I'm led by things like that, if you're aware.
Kimberly Grustas:And, um, I said, okay, if anybody's going to do this, it's going to be me. So that's, I said, between my knowledge of branding, launching brands, working in the sector, and my just passion for girls and knowing that if I was a mom who wanted better for my daughters, that I knew there were other moms out there that were frustrated and I knew my girls at six and eight were just at the beginning, like they weren't even there. So I knew that by you know, 10 and 11, these moms are going what is out there for them. There's like, and there was nothing, it was literally nothing. So I really was a little bit ahead of my time in recognizing that this demographic is just so underserved and I really I was the first company in the United States to launch a brand specifically for this demographic it's.
Jenny Benitez:I was very excited when you reached out and when I got that initial outreach for your product line and what you're doing. So I have daughters, I have twin girls, and they are now growing up in a day and age where everyone is a skincare expert on social media and so they don't have social media. They're little like I'm gonna stall out on that as long as I can but they do see stuff. They're exposed to YouTube, they see different things, and so they've come to me. It's like oh, I really want to get what I want to do a skincare routine. Mommy, what are you using? And I use all natural products. So I'm very like, I'm very particular, but I'm also very like you know, um, simple. I don't buy into all of the fads. I'm like I need a very quick, like 10 to 15 minute skincare routine and I will say this Um, I did interview a dermatologist for the fall season of Steel Roses for 2024.
Jenny Benitez:And everything you're saying, like she said it in her episode, Like I mean, you have to be incredibly mindful of what's in the label and what's in the packaging, because we know marketing right, I love marketing, I look at marketing all the time, Like I do it for a living, but it's everywhere and packages are specifically designed to grab the attention of women, grab the attention of young girls, but really it is what's inside the package and that also the products that are available to you and what's allowed to be on the shelves vary state to state, which I also thought was very interesting and I'm sure you found in your research as well.
Kimberly Grustas:Oh yeah, country to country, state to state. And here's where, you know, when I developed Good Few Girls, there's an emotional, you know, during this time it's very emotional. There's it's an emotional transition Right, and I just, you know, I saw it with my own daughters that they didn't want baby products, new adult products, so I really wanted to develop a product line that spoke to them, that they knew. So it's permission based right. So it's a it's sort of a you know gift from mom to daughter saying I get you, I know we have this transition, this is for you, yeah, this is something specifically for you. And because girls are entering puberty much earlier, their skin issues are starting earlier sebum production you know, really at age nine.
Kimberly Grustas:you know puberty much earlier. Their skin issues are starting earlier Sebum production, you know, really, at age nine you know puberty is not just about the reproductive system. Puberty starts in the brain, the hypothalamus, the pituitary glands, the adrenal glands. It affects every system bones, blood. You know your central nervous system. There's so much growth and I think we forget that right. This is the second largest growth since infancy in our girls and I am a huge cheerleader for puberty positive and I'm not. I'm not talking we need to have, you know, period parties. That is not what I'm talking about. But I'm talking about the language that we use around this transition, because when we empathize and we are reminded as parents, what their little bodies are trying to accomplish or accomplishing yeah, it's amazing and to support that with the proper terminology and understand that these hormones are happening for you not against you Because they will use this, they will have this hormone language their entire lives, and hormones are your friends.
Kimberly Grustas:They are not the enemy. And that's where so so much we we have this negative talk oh, menopause and perimenopause and all of this, you know. And so when they come into this and accepting what is going on in their bodies and loving what's going on in their bodies, loving what's going on in their bodies, that will really set them up for just the language that they're telling themselves around it.
Jenny Benitez:It's very interesting that you brought that up and because you're right, like I mean, when I was growing up, the class that I got was a one day, girls only class and it was specifically focused on you're gonna get your period if you haven't gotten it yet. And the biology of like this is what comes out. This is what you do, this is what you handle it. Here you go, you're on your merry way. Now what I'm hearing you say is let's start preparing our girls early and give them the right like speech behind it. Because, again, I was taught like, oh, it's very hush, hush, don't let. Oh my God, if you had you know, if you got it at your period at school and you and it leaked onto your, I had to wear a uniform. If it got on your uniform, oh God, it's mortifying. Oh, we don't want anyone to know about this, oh my goodness.
Jenny Benitez:And now, when I think about it, I'm like this is insane, like we're, literally. And then you know, yeah, if you had to go to the bathroom, you're trying to be discreet and like tuck this huge, you know pad or whatever into a into your armpits that nobody sees it. This is really not a time to hide, like this is, you know. This is a time to really celebrate. Like your body, like you said, this is a time of growth and it's not just around. Like the biology of the reproductive system, this is your brain, exactly what you just said the reproductive system is last.
Kimberly Grustas:Yeah, it's your bones, it's your blood, it's your brain. That's what.
Jenny Benitez:I was just going to say to you what I've noticed in my own daughters. Now they're still very young, they're only seven, they're going into eight, but I actually do recognize now brain shifts in them and I can pick up, I'm very in tune with them and their little personalities and I can sense when they're having a moment of growth because and they'll tell me they're very communicative. And one of my girls came to me and she was like I don't know what's going on, but I feel different. Something feels different. One of my girls came to me and she was like Mommy, I don't know what's going on, but I feel different.
Kimberly Grustas:Something feels different. Perfect, perfect, perfect. And that is exactly. Yeah, the myelin sheath is changing in their brain, their synapses are running much faster. They can have these outer body experiences, the cortisol we call the cuddle chemicals, right, so the cut. You know, when their relationships with friends, things like, one day we're like hey, yeah, and then the next day they're intense, yeah, that's usually the first thing is you'll start that relationship. So giving them the tools when they're feeling out of control. And you know, when you start talking to them, young, how is you know any issue? You know anything that happened on the playground in school, blah, blah, blah. You have to pick up on those little cues. Well done you, because then you can say the next day okay, how do you feel today? Yep.
Jenny Benitez:That's exactly that's exactly what I do. And I explained to her. I was like, listen. I was like, when you feel like this, it's actually not bad, it's a little bit scary. I was like cause you feel different? I was like but it just means that you're growing. And I explained to them and their little minds there We've been taught my husband. I've been talking to them like this. They were like three and they're staring at us like what are you talking about?
Kimberly Grustas:They're not too young to understand the brain like organs, and the sooner that you can help them with that.
Jenny Benitez:Right.
Kimberly Grustas:And they get the basics. They get the heart and the lungs, they get all that, but they never think about the brain, right? That, right, and they get the basics, they get the heart and the lungs, they get all that, but they never think about the brain, right? They don't necessarily think about the blood, the bones, their skin. Again, you know your skin is your largest organ, right? And it is so much to protect what's inside. It protects you, it's your armor.
Kimberly Grustas:A really positive word and the majority, like, again, I love the fact that the bone growth during puberty, for girls between 11 and 13, the bone growth is what we will actually lose in menopause. Yes, so it's like if we, we understand all those things. Again, they need nutritional support, they need the emotional support and when we're reminded, you know it's not the, suck it up and get over it. And by the time they, by the time they give the talk in school, if you've already started to communicate with them about their bodily systems that all these hormones are affecting, they'll breeze through that Cause again. They're already gone. They're going to know about majority, because if you're talking about that, you're going to talk. And when we talk about the little stuff now, it makes those conversations the harder conversations or the more icky conversations to that right A little bit easier. Yeah, so much easier. And then you've already established yourself as the go-to. Yeah, you're the one in the know, cause at seven you know, you're the smarty pants right they get, then you're stupid, right.
Jenny Benitez:Right, I will say you know what I've done too with them. And and I have a question for you outside of this but what I've also done too with them is when they do ask me something, I'm very transparent and I'll say to them, like you know what either one I'll be like well, how, you know, how complex do you want me to go? And then I'll say, like I'm going to try to break this down for you. But then, on the flip side, I also say to them why don't we just, why don't we look it up?
Kimberly Grustas:Let's look it up.
Jenny Benitez:Because exactly what? So you're, what you explained in your journey is you're very self-researched, well-read. I do the same thing. I have a relative she was a former co-host for me on the podcast incredibly well-researched, because she had to go through food allergies she didn't know existed and then she found out in her mid-20s or whatever, and it changed her life in her like mid twenties or you know whatever, and it changed her life.
Jenny Benitez:And so the reading and the research is, I think, a crucial element for women and I don't think we give ourselves enough credit for how much we take in. And this is all also about like advocating for yourself, because for your situation, when you have a child who has severe allergies or when you have a child that's ill, you do have to be their advocate. So you actually do have to do your own research, because the doctors only know so much, and it's not to discount their education and it's not to discount their degree. They went to school like we were going to put our trust there. However, there is research consistently coming out it's impossible to keep up with. I just had a doctor's appointment yesterday Granted, again, I'm very well researched and the doctor who came into the room started quoting statistics to me that I knew were not current, and I just kind of let it go because I'm like, oh, okay, she's not up on her research and I'm going to switch to somebody else because of the way she was treating me.
Jenny Benitez:But it's a.
Jenny Benitez:It's a good example to say, like you know, I don't have a medical degree at all, but I do work in marketing and I work in the medical industry and I do have to do quite a bit of research to make sure that I can articulate about the particular products that we're talking about.
Jenny Benitez:Like, and I jokingly will say to my family there I'm like well, dr Mom's going to give youa diagnosis, but go to a real doctor too and let's see, like, if it matches up, and nine times out of 10. I'm correct, but it's all because of that research. So I wanted to commend you there for that, because you know, as a mom, you you go to bat for your kids and you're going to do that research and you're going to do that legwork. But this also inspired you to take this path to make these products, and I want to hone in on the, the elements in the products themselves. That are things that we need to be aware of and not to put you on the spot, but if you know of any, off the top of your head, because I didn't always look at those things and I'm sure there's a lot of moms out there too they're like well, I just bought this because it's marketed to my kid, I assume it's safe.
Kimberly Grustas:Right, right, and again, that's the critical thinking part, right, and I want to just touch with something that you said earlier, a little bit earlier, in that you know, when we look at as women right, the next time we were when do we really take care of ourselves? When's the next pregnancy? Yeah, right, it's amazing. So what happens between? Like there's, there's really nothing like. The first time a woman will look at her health physically is when she's trying to conceive. Yeah, like, so what's happened all those years before? Like no, because, again, that sets the foundation for our health as an adult. We need to be our children's advocate. So for me, it was really ironic.
Kimberly Grustas:In 2008, the environmental after I launched this company, the environmental working group did a study and they tested the blood and the urine of a bunch of teens and they found chemicals, only found a ton of chemicals found in their blood and their urine that were only found in personal care products, and they identified that the average young person actually uses more products, more chemicals, than the average woman. Because we kind of pare down, right, and this is also part of what makes girls so fabulous, right, they're creative, they're experimental, they want to try new things, and this is what makes girls so fabulous, right, they're creative, they're experimental, they want to try new things and this is what makes us so cool, like, right, it's just there they are, these little try it all, right, these little bundles of energy, and they just want all of this stuff. And as adults we know kind of less is more like we're more critical of that. So that came. Actually, that study came out and there is a link in one of my blogs to it. Chemicals of concern. But I always reflect back to the environmental working group. I let a lot of these groups, like the breast cancer and things like that organization they will do.
Kimberly Grustas:I refer back to a lot of their research and so my whole thing is is if we even think that some of these chemicals whether it's the fragrances, the dyes you know, you know pegs, polyethylene glycol there's a lot of ingredients that we know that are just. We just don't want them building up in our systems. We know that they're bad. So why would we like? If we have an alternative, why wouldn't we use that? So you know, dyes are a big thing and now they're in, you know, food. We're starting to talk about that. Like you said, the European union versus the U? S there's, you know, sometimes companies will make two versions. You know you've heard the fruit loop thing lately. I don't know if you've had the fruit right, right, and you know just the levels of autism that are up and there's just so much. So it's like, okay, I believe you know the government can only regulate so much because it takes them so long to do anything honestly. So it's all about consumer dollars.
Kimberly Grustas:Honestly that's what's going to move the needle.
Kimberly Grustas:Just don't buy it right. And if a company, if you're buying a product on a website or wherever you're buying it, if they do not list the Inkey label you know the full ingredient list that's a, that's a warning, like, don't even buy it, steer clear of it. And then, if you know, again, intelligent enough to say, hey, I'm picking up a label, there's an ingredient I don't understand, and not all, not all you know. If it's a, I want to say chemical, you know is is necessarily bad, right, right. But if it's loaded, like, if that's all that's in a product, right, then you might want to steer, you might want to steer clear of it. You know our product and, again, even some of the natural products. They have big, long names, right, they sound, but they're not right. It's, it's, it's a, it's an herb or a botanical, which is, which in an inky nomenclature you have to spell it all out, you know. So I think it's just critical thinking. It's saying, hey, you know what I'm worth reading a label, you know, and, and that's really you know. And then you know that's just for internal purposes. And then I mean, there's things where you're in because you, again, your skin is, is your protectant, so you do not want to damage the pH or the microbiome of your skin. Your skin is there to protect you and especially in young people, you know they the sebum is there again to protect them during this large growth Right, and the more sebum you have, actually, the less wrinkles you have.
Kimberly Grustas:As an adult, which I love to give talks to, before COVID I gave talks to, I would go to middle schools and I would talk and if you've never been intimidated, think of standing in front in an auditorium with 200 middle school girls. I loved it, I absolutely loved it, because my goal was to make them feel better about themselves. And the girls with you know I'm greasy and acne and you know whatever. They would reluctantly raise their hand and I would say girl, you have less wrinkles and all of a sudden it just changes the language. It makes them feel good about themselves.
Kimberly Grustas:Yeah, and a lot of the things that they're experiencing the acne and the clogged pores it's simply a bacterial. Yes, you know, it's bacteria related related. It's not necessarily hormonal related, especially when they're younger and you look at their lifestyle. They're in class all day, they can't go wash their hands, I swear and and you know now, they're exposed to this horrible hand sanitizer sanitizer with the alcohol, and oh god, I know, I know and and you know, and so you know I wish we just had free bath, like go to the bathroom anytime, anytime you want, like this is hygiene.
Kimberly Grustas:Part of it is just so important. You know, again, their scalp is changing, they're growing, and so you see patterns where it's more bacteria related. So what we really need to do with the girls is just get rid of the dirt, the grime and bacteria, but without upsetting the microbiome or the pH of the skin. And that's where I formulate. I say, okay, what do we know? I make no, I make no claims against. You know, it's acne. I make no claims on that. That the healthier your skin is and the more you can support your skin, the better it can right.
Kimberly Grustas:But we also think about hydration, nutrition. This is a time in a girl's life where they're not getting that support. They are dehydrated, so their skin and their pores are not doing what it should naturally do when they're well hydrated. They're not eating the best, they're not sleeping the best, so it's like all system failure, right. And so then there's this freakout, and then what happens is they overdo and your skin, like your muscle, has memory. Your skin will always strive for that balance. So if you're drying out or stripping your skin, especially young skin that has all that yummy, delicious sebum it's going to say, okay, hydrate, hydrate, hydrate, hydrate, right, and it's going to kick it into overdrive.
Kimberly Grustas:So, you know, there's so many simple things that we can do again to ward off. You know, know some of these things. Um, you know, the changing the pillowcase on a regular basis, sure that they, they are actually using a nice skincare routine before they use makeup. That's a biggie, that's one thing is right before they're introduced to makeup, because that just is the introduction of bacteria. So it's really, and again, just doing good things for them. You know, even the deodorant and the bathing, all of those things, just it's tools, it's a toolbox, right? That's the way I look at it is. It's like a toolbox for them, for their unique and it just it's such a positive and that's why I got you know I was so frustrated that there weren't products out there, because it does start earlier, and that's why I got you know I was so frustrated that there weren't products out there, because it does start earlier and I would see, I did a trade show once. I got to tell you I, I, I'm going to, I might cry, um, I'm starting to cry. Okay, so I did. I did, actually was a whole foods. I was standing at whole foods at dinnertime and I had my products.
Kimberly Grustas:This is what happens when you're a small brand. You just have to stand there and there was a mother that came up. My daughter doesn't need this, like you know, her daughter was probably around 11. Okay, her daughter was hunched over, arms crossed in just this horrible and she needed this. Yeah, this girl was not given permission to wash her face and I just went, I just saw. I mean, it was just so devastating. It's like how are you ignoring? Yeah, you know what, like, this is not. I am not pushing mascara on your love and your faith, it's that kind of thing. This is something she needs and you are completely blind to understanding. But just her posture, her behavior.
Jenny Benitez:The body language.
Kimberly Grustas:Yeah, the body language is always so devastating and I was like here free samples, free samples, like take it all, it's okay, it's fine, take some free samples.
Kimberly Grustas:You know, and it's like so, but there wasn't anything again. And our girls, when they get to a certain age, they don't want the koala bears and the elephants, like you know what I mean. It's babyish. They just don't want that kind of stuff. And anything anti-aging is really formulated for anti-aging, right you, for women, it's really formulated for women, and not to say that there aren't female products that they can't use. Um, but again, I, that's where I I said listen, I'm not going to, I'm not going to pretend I'm going to be for everybody, but right, right, pick a lane, pick a lane, and that's my lane.
Jenny Benitez:This is my lane. You know what I think is, um, I think what I think here the biggest takeaway really is, like the, the self-education, and then also like making sure you're what you said. Like your, your daughters, even your sons, like boys, need skincare too, like we were. We were joking here the other day because my stepdaughter, my stepdaughter's in the beauty industry. She's um, she's a hairstylist and but she, I mean, she's always been really into all the beauty stuff Me not so much.
Jenny Benitez:My mom was a I'm gonna splash some soap and water on my face and some light cream and that's it. That's, that's where it stopped for her. So it was never really a big factor for me. But after I had girls I started to.
Jenny Benitez:As they were getting older, I was noticing they are paying attention to pretty much everything I'm doing and because of them I've actually made it a point to step up how I'm managing myself, what I'm doing for self-care in terms of and I don't mean self-care like I'm taking a spa and I'm doing this and I'm spending an hour and a half I'm not talking about that because I don't have an hour and a half to spend on my skin, but I mean like just making sure that, like they see, like the particular products and I was explaining it to them I'm like listen, girls.
Jenny Benitez:I'm like this is what we're doing, this is you know, this is what you're allowed to use, this is what mommy uses and making sure that they have that baseline Because, as you said, like giving them the information they need. This is going to prepare them for when they go out into the world. That's always how I look at this. Everything we're educating our kids on is you're one day going to step out this outside of this house and you're going to get a deluge. It's a flood of information that's coming your way. So you need to have this baseline of you need to, as you said, shower daily, make sure that you have products that don't have alcohol in it in your face you got.
Jenny Benitez:You do have to look up the products, and what I think also is misunderstood across the board is that products build up in your system over time, so it doesn't mean if you don't have an you know an allergic reaction immediately to something, okay, that's fine, but you might. In a little while, I had a situation, not related to skincare, where I was taking all these vitamins, right, and I just kept adding vitamins to my daily routine. This is like a couple, like, I think, three years ago and so I had like this slew of vitamins that I was taking, not realizing that I was allergic to one of them. I still, to this day, don't know which one it was. But I started getting this alert I would take all my vitamins and I would break out into a rash and everything would start to tingle and I was like I could not figure out which was which.
Jenny Benitez:I didn't want to waste time trying to eliminate because at that point I was like at this, at this stage, like I can't be on Benadryl and try to be a person all day. So I ended up like completely wiping everything out, got rid of everything and then started fresh and was like let me just do a detox, get everything out of my body and then just go baseline what I know that I need, because in the beauty industry, and for women especially, we are getting so much fed to us and we're told like, oh, you have to do all these things. You have to put a cold compress and you got to use this light thing on your face now. And now you got to do. You got to put the light goggles with the light mass and then you got to take this frozen ice thing and roll it over your face and then you got to put the gel under your eyes and it's like this wild, wild ride and three hours later you're ready to start your day I had a grandma and I love grandmas.
Kimberly Grustas:I love grandmas, they're great. I had a grandma call me and says my daughter, does my daughter need the fridge, the beauty fridge? No, your granddaughter at 12 years old does not need the beauty fridge.
Kimberly Grustas:Yeah, save your money. But no, you're, it's, it's so, it you're, it's just so, true, and I love your you're. You're singing to the choir, you're preaching the choir. You know we have so many similarities, but it is it's just this constant. It's this constant bombardment.
Kimberly Grustas:Um and again, like I said, their skin, your, your skin, will always try to protect you. Right, when a product, I always do patch testing. You know, right, when a product, I always do patch testing. You know, when you do a patch, try a new product, put it behind your ear, you know, put it in your elbow. But when you, when you were a parent who has food allergy kids, like I'm doing elimination, like that is that's how we live. Right, the process of elimination.
Kimberly Grustas:But you know, you, you do have to do, you do have that, have that testing and, like when you have a dermatitis, like if you have a, something reacts. Your skin has a dermatitis. Well, that's not just a little rash, no, like that's a big deal. Yeah, like, right. And how do they usually treat a dermatitis? They give you a steroid. Yeah, you know it's crazy. And then again, your skin is now exposed, right, and a lot of these products that they're pushing, and they are young people. These 12 year olds are running to Sephora to buy are because they cellular turnover. That's the, that's the talk now, right, we have to turn the cells over. Well, the whole thing is their skin is the goal. Yeah, right, so, as women, their skin. So there's nothing to turn over now right, there they are.
Kimberly Grustas:They are not supposed to be turning over, right? Their skin is growing If you look.
Kimberly Grustas:No. So that sebum and that oil and that production is there to protect you. And when we're using alpha hydroxy acids, beta hydroxy acids, scrubs and things like that, what you're doing is you're really exposing them to UV damage. We will not. They won't see the effects of that UV damage until they're adults, right, let's be honest. So you know, I wish that these influencers were more pushing sunscreen than anything else.
Kimberly Grustas:My dermatologist said my 21 year old is hysterical. I love her, and she again. Both of my girlies are just so up to date on all of this, and, of course, because of me. But my 21 year old she's like mom. I'm never going to get a wrinkle Like she is the sunscreen queen. Did you do a hat? Oh yeah, oh yeah, it's awesome. And her skin at 21 years old is just beautiful. But she gets it, she totally gets it, and it really is a less is more and, honestly, there's a switch when you realize that your skin, like you, can get to that place where you're just really appreciating. You know. And here's the other, here's the other thing that kills me, right, the glow, all of these products to put back a glow, to give girls a glow Like they have it already they have the glow.
Jenny Benitez:I want that glow.
Kimberly Grustas:It's like, you know, give me a pimple, give me that, see if I'm back back, give me all that, I'll take it right. And so that's what's just the crazy, again, that that goes back to their critical thinking. And that's what we can also do as parents is sit with them and talk to them like, why do you want this product? Who's selling you this product? Let's look at, talk and let's see earns commission, right, let's see what's back there, what are the other products? And yeah, oh, she's pushing this product, but she also pushed 30 last week, right, you know? So we? That's also another thing that we can critically, you know, we can teach them that critical thing and then say, if they really want something passionately today, say, come back to me tomorrow or the next day or the next day, and right, they might. They might be onto something else, but I want to touch on what you said about taking care of it.
Kimberly Grustas:We are always at the bottom of the barrel as moms when they're little. That's our role. We get it Now. They're safe, right, you can leave the room, they're not going to hurt themselves, right, and they are watching you. I love the idea because they are and how you treat yourself is so huge. And now is the time to reclaim that Right, do that journey with them and hold each other accountable. Right, you can do those spa days you can Right. Right, let's, you know, pick a book, you pick a book, we'll have our own little book club, we'll do our own little.
Kimberly Grustas:Downtime is critical and when we talk, you know I don't know if we mentioned the adrenal glands, because the adrenals have a big effect also on puberty Um, it's pubic hair and body odor and the adrenals. So, you know, we all know as adults, that you know we have fatigue, adrenal fatigue, because we're running, running, running, running, running, and we're now seeing a lot of the children are having a little bit of that, that fatigue as well. So, giving our girls and our sons that specific timeout, giving it to ourselves, yeah, like doing, and it doesn't have to be two hours, it could be, you know, half an hour, it could be 40 minutes, but and then hold each other accountable and then they're your buddy in this, in this process. And so I love that bonding that moms, cause I love to talk to moms whose daughters are not quite there yet, cause you just memory banks, right, because again, it's that, that communication that will strengthen your relationship. And then, when they're 21, girl, there's nothing you can say.
Jenny Benitez:Yeah, that's it.
Kimberly Grustas:That's it, right. So so we we do have our time is so limited, and it's crazy because we you don't think about it when they're seven. You think more of that window when they're 14, 15. Right.
Jenny Benitez:Which is why I'm thinking of it now.
Kimberly Grustas:I know what's coming College and you know, and so that's why I, just again, I love the language, the positive language, I love teaching them the ownership of their bodies and that, and having pride, cause when you own something, you take care of it, you feel better.
Kimberly Grustas:And it's not that you can't, you know, have a Dorito once in a while or right that kind of thing. But even your own journey as moms. Hey, let's make a smoothie, let's get some these out. Let's make, let's make some healthy granola bars for snacks for school. Right, like, get them example, especially in their nutrition. Teaching your kids how to cook and be part of that process is huge, yes, huge. Get them involved, don't just stick it in front of them, say, hey, pick them. You know, when they're older, pick a meal out. What do you want to make once a week? Yeah, right, what. Or be in charge of the menu. I mean that is because, again, when they go to college or when they're little, it's.
Kimberly Grustas:My daughters decided that they were vegetarians in high school freshman year and they were both on the swim team. They had to be at the swim platform at 530 in the morning and if they weren't there at 530 in the morning, they were locked out and so, yeah, so nutrition was super huge and I was like, oh, you know, we need to, you need to figure this out because you need, you need proper nutrition. They're going to be doing this because this is a huge commitment and I can tell you, both of them are amazing cooks today because they learned. They said I have to feed my, I have to feed it, I have to feed the body.
Jenny Benitez:The. The part that I think is um I and it's funny everything you're saying. I'm like, oh, I do that, oh, I do that because you know.
Jenny Benitez:I think that there's um, when, when I was growing up, it was very much, uh, um, adults didn't explain it to you. It was just like well, this is what it is. It's cause I said so and when I, when I had kids, I was committed to not saying because I said so Because I need them to understand the why behind it. Now I will say this it is kind of annoying now because everything is like well, I don't understand why, and I'm like oh my God. So I have to explain myself, like to the umpteenth degree. Sometimes they mess with me, but sometimes they legitimately are like no, but why? Like why? So everything gets explained to them and I want to encourage other moms too, like I know, in the thick of things, sometimes you just want to be like can you just do what? I'm asking? I have those, I have those moments too. But what again? What you're doing is preparing them for the world. Now, these guys, I mean, they drive me crazy. They're a tornado of energy. However, they also do step up and cook with mommy and then we talk through things.
Jenny Benitez:There was I gave my son a metaphor the one day and I want to share. This is actually a little bit funny. He's very sharp. And we were cooking together and we were taking out, we were making apple pancakes and the outside of the apple was ugly like the skin peel. So there was, it was just discolored or whatever. But I already knew it was good inside and so he made a comment to me. He was like oh, mommy, no, this one's bad. Look at it, it's bad.
Jenny Benitez:And I was like I used it as a teachable moment. I was like Well, buddy, I'm like just because this one looks different from this one doesn't mean that it's different inside. It's probably still really good. Let's take a look. And I opened it up and he was like oh, yeah, you're right. And I was like yeah, you see. So you really can't look at the outside and really understand what's going on. You really have to take time to get to know what the what it is. And he was like he kept going with the pancake mix. Then he stopped and goes I see what you did, mommy, I'm like I wish that worked with avocados, though.
Jenny Benitez:I know no avocados, I will never use that on an avocado. Avocados are like a wild card. But that having those discussions with your kids and making them aware and and involving them, as you said, because even like for nutrition, like we're talking about skincare, but skincare actually does start with what you're consuming and what you're putting in your body. I'm a vegetarian as well, so, but nobody else in my house is. But I make sure that there's vegetarian options available. At one point there was a year and a half to your period where everybody was eating plant based. Everybody else hated it. So they've all stopped. But but and there was part of me that was like I had to stop it for the kids because I needed them to get their protein and I needed them to get certain things. So I was like I can't sacrifice this. Like they're gonna have to, you know, go for the organic chicken, organic meat, like you know, go that route to make sure they're not getting those extra hormones in their food. But yeah, they're aware of vegetarian versus meat, like what meats are healthy. I allow them to eat bacon, even, and but I'll tell them, like you know, this really isn't good for you and I've showed them like the grease and I'm like you see this, like this going into your body and then it's coming out of your body in different ways, like all of this builds up.
Jenny Benitez:My daughters have a sensitivity to dairy and they never got formally tested for it. But when they were very young we were, you know, bottle feeding. All the time they're having their bottles and up until about two or three years old we were about two years old we were still letting them have bottles and but they were throwing up a lot. We were still letting them have bottles and but they were throwing up a lot, like it wasn't fever related, just every once in a while, like they just would be consistently throwing up and my husband kept saying to me he's like you know, they're probably allergic to dairy, like their stomachs were like distended.
Kimberly Grustas:50% of the world population is lactose intolerant. Yes, and people don't know Well, that number is growing 10% a year, but that's you know. So the thing is is that you know that protein it is a great. You know it is a good source of protein.
Kimberly Grustas:So we need to find better alternatives. But yeah, no, that's a, that's a huge thing. And here's the other thing too is kids again being a food if they don't like something, like if your kid doesn't like cheese, like who the heck doesn't like cheese? Right, listen, yes, listen, or they could you know. So there's a gluten thing, you know and again listen.
Kimberly Grustas:When I talked to somebody the other day and they said you know, I had no idea that my son couldn't have gluten and he, when we remove the gluten, he's like mommy, I didn't know, my stomach wasn't supposed to hurt all the time. Oh right, so so you know, and so that you, you know, and you know it only works in. You know, carrots most kids aren't. You know they're not allergic to carrots.
Jenny Benitez:Right, I mean carrots, broccoli.
Kimberly Grustas:I think everyone I was a mom that like hid everything, like I would whip them up and like hide the vegetables and stuff, just make sure get them kind of thing, the lengths I went to.
Kimberly Grustas:But it's so important again when you're aware, just understanding that their little bodies are trying to do so much. I get so sad when people, oh, she's crabby, no, they're crabby. I'm like, yeah, you'd be crabby. You'd be crabby too, right? So I think that's just a great reminder of of again what their bodies and at the same time, that, being a student, you know a great student the athletics that we're doing with our kids. It's insane between travel and this, I mean you would think that they were professional athletes in some of this stuff. And again, especially during a time with the bone growth, Now we do have a sedentary lifestyle too.
Kimberly Grustas:We do have that. That is not cool. We need to keep our kids moving, but again, when they are athletic and in a particular sport, we have to make sure that their bodies are being fed. We just have to Because, again, understanding the development as adults, we don't, we've, we sort of forget that, and I think it's just so important.
Jenny Benitez:And one other tip too I want to talk about with the food intake that I had read when I was when I was starting the journey of like overhauling my nutrition, because my nutrition was abysmal for a very long time, I think up until about five years ago. I think it was like 35 when I started to actually pay attention and I had read that in the grocery store, if you shop the perimeter of the grocery store, that's where all the fresh stuff is. Once you start going down the aisles it's like a labyrinth of things that are stock full of like things you really don't want to put in your body. And now we have great options for like organic products. There's great options for gluten free products Thank God there's more stuff available. There's great plant based products, but you still have to be mindful of which ones you're going for, because there are fillers in a lot of things.
Kimberly Grustas:Oh, absolutely, and I mean I was, I was raised, I mean I was, I was raised. You know, I was raised.
Jenny Benitez:I was raised in the invention of the, the pouch of rice, you know, like the macaroni and cheese, because that's where I was.
Kimberly Grustas:Like just yeah, it was not a thing like the ease, right, what they sold her, what they sold our mom, you know the ease's and the independents and all these meals and whatever. So, yeah, so, and again, I think when you're understanding to your kids then you can identify maybe a problem, right. And again, remember they're growing. It's like two and three quarters to three inches a year. It's crazy when you're marking your door when they grow, that's when we really start those conversations about oh my gosh, you have all these hormones that are being released in your body supporting you grow.
Kimberly Grustas:It's not a you know jack-in-the-beanstalk thing, right, they, they just, but they they get it. Yes, right, they are hard enough to get it, they are smart and so, and especially in taller right. So they have the. They have the aches and the pains, right. And you know, we know, that estrogen is very beneficial in girls for this growth process, but too much estrogen at the end of their growth can actually shorten their height because it closes. Yeah, so you know. That's why, if you pay attention as a parent, or again, if you know that your son is supposed to be growing three inches a year and he's not, yeah like off so
Kimberly Grustas:that doesn't happen by the time they're 50. That happens when they're, you know, 11, starting to watch this and they're not fully developed until 18. Girls, 19, right, and we know again, their brains are not fully developed till they're 20. So we've got a really awesome window to pay attention and to just really take note. And if, if you have a doctor or a pediatrician that says hand, yeah, I'm out of you, say no, right, give my kid a blood test. Yep, right, check the testosterone, check the progesterone, check the, check the estrogen. It's a simple blood test, right?
Kimberly Grustas:I want to make sure that we're on target here. If you recognize something or there's breast development happening earlier, right, they might have buds. You know, I had brought my daughter. She developed breast buds at six years old. That's yeah, right, yeah. So it's like, and again, there can be surges and things like that, but I wanted to make sure that this wasn't something, a bigger issue that we had to worry about, right? So if you're just an aware parent because the worst thing again we can do as parents is eat ourselves up because we didn't pay attention, right, I wish I knew, like, I wish I you know, and but even again, having those conversations, how's your body feel you?
Kimberly Grustas:can watch and are they hurting, like it might be something. Again, they are in it, so they're it's. You know what I mean. They might not be aware that their body, like hey, you're kind of walking a little funny or you're a little achy, or even their sleep patterns Remember their melatonin is changing almost three hours different. Yeah, so when you have a teenager, you know a tween that's not sleeping, that's an actual physical thing. So you need to adjust their schedule to allow for them to get that, that, that sleep that they need. That's not a. That's not a. My kid just wants to stay up late and play video games.
Jenny Benitez:Right, that's like an actual thing yeah.
Kimberly Grustas:That's the thing that's happening to them, right, and you know, and we're exhausted and we just want to go to sleep and then we can't. And I do. I always find it ironic, again with the girl thing. I was just so meant to be a girl, mom, I, it's just crazy. But um, you know, I, in respecting, they're coming in, we're going out, right, there is so much to communicate and to be out right and again, again, how we treat ourselves.
Kimberly Grustas:You know, oh horrible today and I feel feel good today. Today we just have to check ourselves and watch how we, how we communicate. They do fear, right, they can fear that process, they can fear the aging process, they can fear, and they're not even there yet Right, right. So, and again, that's why we have to be good to ourselves, we have to set examples, we have to model that behavior. And that doesn't mean I was truly transparent in running a business and if I had bad days, good days, my daughter.
Jenny Benitez:I tell them what they know. I'm recording in my son's room right now, by the way, because because we have guests this weekend and I was like I don't have any space, Like I, there's no quiet, my quiet areas are no longer quiet this weekend. So he like cleared his desk off, he made me a little welcome sign, he put office supplies and was like mommy, you can use my. Yeah, Like you know, they, I.
Jenny Benitez:That transparency I think wasn't present when I was growing up and I tell people all the time I'm like it, be honest with your kids, I, they know when, when I'm having a bad day, like day, and they come home from school, I'll sit them all down like really quick. I just want to tell you I'm having a really tough day. Mommy might be snipping at you for various reasons, sorry about that up front and I'll apologize again later. So just take it easy on me. And it's crucial and you're right, we only have a small window where they're ours and they're going to listen to us and then that window is gone. So getting that baseline for their nutrition, their skincare, making them aware and making sure that you're also acknowledging what they're saying to you If they, for example, all my kids have sensitivity to dairy and my husband used to get really mad at them before we realized what was going on.
Jenny Benitez:When we would order pizza, they all would pull the cheese off. Nobody wanted the cheese and he would still to this day. He has a hard time with waste. He's very old school, so he has a hard time with it and I always have to nudge him like baby, it's all right, like they're all sensitive to dairy. It's okay if they want to pull that cheese off. If your kid doesn't want to eat pizza and is like, oh, I don't want that, try to pay attention. I know some kids are just picky and it's kind of a pain in the butt. But if you're paying attention to these cues you actually might discover something, as you said, that isn't on the doctor's radar, isn't on anyone's radar.
Jenny Benitez:My cousin that was my co-host when she was, I think, 10, 11 years old. She was having severe pain where she'd be crying in her legs and the doctors just said growth spurts, that's it. They couldn't figure out what it was. They were testing her for whatever this, that. And the next thing, couldn't figure it out, said it was growth spurts. Flash forward 20 years when she actually discovers that she has celiacs because she was going through her body, went through so much swelling that it started affecting everything across the board. It was fact. She was getting dizzy all the time, like she was incredibly unwell, and a neurologist is the one who said hey, have you ever actually gotten tested for this?
Jenny Benitez:So it's just making sure that you're paying attention to all those things and it's a lot. Obviously you have children, you're a mom, like you're doing all the things but trying to be, have that mindfulness, and even if it's like you said which I think you said earlier that you had the idea for the good for your, for you, girls like you had that idea I have. Shower thoughts are like big deals to me Because it's a moment of silence If you really think about it, it's a moment of calm, and whatever comes out to you in those moments is something that's important. So I really think it's really critical to pay attention to yourself there. And the reason why I'm making this through line is I have shower moments where I'm like oh, you know what. My kids said this, let me make sure I check in on them with that. Or, oh, this was done, I have to check on that, you know. Like it's okay, like if that's your inspirational moment, like go with it, pay attention, because that's your intuition saying to you like you got to do something here.
Kimberly Grustas:Yeah, and you said intuition. So I again, I with girls in development. There was a book years ago. It's called Sleeping Beauties. It's by a psychologist and it doesn't talk about the grim fairy tales. Like Sleeping Beauty, you know, she falls asleep and she's kissed by a prince, kind of thing. But what it does is it recognizes the need for girls, during this critical age of development, to look inward and to go into themselves. That's the whole point of the Sleeping Beauty thing is to go inward to then emerge as the strong, powerful women that we're meant to be. And intuition, sixth sense, all of that is developed, I believe, during these years of development.
Kimberly Grustas:So I think you know, giving the, our daughters and our sons the downtime to be quiet in their head is just, we don't talk about it enough, we really don't talk about it. I love, you know I, when I'm quiet, when I do like I'll paint a room I won't have a radio on, like I'll paint an entire room in complete silence. You know, because I love, I've now welcomed those thoughts in my brain. So anything that gives me that time. Even when I go for a walk, I'm not listening to music, I'm in complete silence, I walk out, complete silence, because I've welcomed how my brain processes. You know what, what's happening in there and it's almost like I'm a. I'm standing by observing it, like I know that sounds so freaking weird.
Jenny Benitez:I actually I meditate, so I understand what you're talking about Exactly.
Kimberly Grustas:Yeah, my brain is doing its thing and I'm just sitting here waiting until it figures it out, and right, and then sometimes, like I'll have something on repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat, and then all of a sudden it'll come, you know, and so I mean I just always thought that was a creative person to me, cause I struck, you know, the creative. You know, brain in me is just like never shuts off, it's like shut up already. But but that is so important, that's six cents and we have that, and especially as young women they're going to college.
Jenny Benitez:They need those goosebumps. We have to make sure that they know that you have to listen to your intuition and I have to tell you, if we go down that path, I'll be recording with you for another hour, because that's a big one. I'm telling you right now. That's such a big one that society has basically told us like we're crazy and not to listen to that inner voice and to ignore it, that you're being paranoid. There's all these little subtle messages that have been told to us.
Kimberly Grustas:Anyone who knows that that's a real, real deal.
Jenny Benitez:Total garbage. Like. You need to listen to yourself, Like your gut instinct is like your. This is our survival instinct. That's with us, and if you don't pay attention to that, you can find yourself in some very not good situation. So absolutely, Kim, thank you so much for being on the podcast today. I'm going to link your website with your products in the description of the podcast Listeners, check it out. I already have some things in my cart, so I know I want to start looking at things, but I encourage you to check out Kim's products really and be mindful of what you're purchasing and what you're, you know, putting on your own shelf for yourself too, Because, yes, it's for our children. But also, like, really start to think about. Like, what are you putting into your body through your skin? Kim, thank you again so much for joining us today. Thank you so much, Jenny. I had fun and everyone listeners. We'll see you on the next one, Take care.
